` hurr story -nurr-fitri '

FINALLY!!!! :)

2010-12-18T15:41:00.009+08:00

OMG!! Like finally, i'm able to post something on my blog after a zillion days of ignoring it. Hahhahs.. Life's been busy with all its ups & downs. But the best part of my life is that I had fun & am happy every single day. :) Anyway, above is a picture of my classmate, Ke Hong, & I. Aren't he cute?? :) Okay, now is already holidays & honestly, I've got lots of projects to complete. Actually, it's just 3 projects to be completed & i'm attending a camp on Tuesday @ Sentosa! & I've heard that there'll be a session with the dolphins!! OMG, I can't wait to touch them!! :)

& the best part of all, Ke Hong is going!! :) Yay!! It's been a long long while since I last attended a camp. I was thinking of signing up for adventure camps but unfortunately, I don't think my classmates will be interested to go. *sigh* Oh well. This past week is my CT & I'm glad to say it's over but I don't think I'll do well in this sem. Everything was tedious & ya, I don't want to talk about it. It just makes me piss. Oh well. Below are pictures while we were in KL.

At the petronas bridge. The scenary from above is beautidul. :)

This is my classmates & I @ putrajaya, where we get to see beautiful buildings. :)

This is the first night that we arrive @ Grand Blue wave Hotel (a 5-star hotel).

These are the guys from my class who went. :)

We took a class picture. :)

These are the girls & we were in our hotel room, about to leave for Singapore. :)

Overall, I should say the trip was enjoyable & fun & those buildings really took my breath away. It's beautiful & I get to see the pink mosque. & the most most most best part of all? I get to eat subway!! hahahs, besides good food makes me happy! :)

I guess that's all. I'll post more after I went for my camp & after an outing with all my friends.

I do miss bitching with my sisters & brothers. Gonna meet up with them soon!

Ciaoz! 'Til than!

Everyday is a gift. :)

2010-10-12T14:43:00.002+08:00

ELLO!! :)
I would like to hereby officially announce that my timetable sucks big time, like upside down inside out and I allow it to be thrash into the garbage bin or be eaten by some wild animal in the woods or forest . Okay, I'm not making any sense but arrghh. *bang head on the table*
Seriously, Monday, class ends at 6pm & I don't give a damn.
I already 'book' my dad to fetch me from NP every Monday, so it's a no problem at all.
& out of the 5-days, Wed is the most suckiest day ever & I don't even know if there is such a word. Really, class starts at 8am?? I've to freaking wake up so early and get a ride from Daddy.
But good thing, I've got only 4 hours of class. & the rest of the days?
Officially, dooms day. Get in at 9am & get back at 5pm. Office hour.
Yeah, might as well, work at a freaking office and atleast get paid. *sigh*
I shouldn't make a big deal out of this right? It's part of life right?
Gah, nowadays, waking up at 9am is such a nuisance to me & how am I suppose to wake up as early as 6am??
& so great, I thought my KL-trip is next week but it's officially this week!
Hahahs.. I laugh at myself when I realized that & I haven even start to pack yet.
Tomorrow will be the next briefing & Thursday, my HipHop mates & I are going bottle hunting.
The only problem with bottle hunting is that every world of sports i go, there's no that water bottle, all the normal one. & I was thinking of getting slippers instead, if there's no that kind.
Last few days, I've been watching commonwealth game on Men's dive.
Like OMFG!!! Those guys are HOT, GORGEOUS & HANDSOME!!!
Those Canada & Aussie guys, so HOTTTT!!! Hahahahs..
Anyway, I've not been online for quite sometime.
I'm just lazy to online. Maybe it's because I have my twitter & FB to keep me inform. :)
& this is just great. Fb just kick me out due to some maintenance problems.
What the freak? & my brother took along hard disk with him & now I can't transfer any movie.
So damn. Oh well, I'm just gonna watch anime now.
Ciaoz people & I'll update after my KL-trip! :)

MY LIFE IS AWESOME!! :]

2010-10-01T12:19:00.002+08:00

Hey humans, people, whatever.

Hahahhas.. Technically, I feel happy at the moment, just this moment.

Wanna know why??

My results rocks!!!! I pass all my modules with mostly B+ & 1 A & 1 C+ but who cares?

The most important of all is that I PASSED!!

Weee, no more ECA to take!! & next sem, I'm taking BIO!!

I so can't wait for Bio to start.

I'm trying my best right now to blog super fast since my lappy bat left only 15% & i'm so lazy to charge it. I'll charge it sometime next week.

& not to mention the fact that I'm going to Malaysia for a study trip but it's gonna be fun.

Well, if it's not fun, I'll make it fun! :)

Hehehs, I'm known for being high high and up above.

Main important thing is to be positive all the time! :)

I can't wait for my parents to return home to tell them!

& that reminds me of what happen yesterday though.

Each time a fmaily member of mine pass away, a little part of me died along with them.

It won't be the same without them & yes, I'll miss them alot. :(

But life as I knew it, have to move on.

& I know my grandpa haven left me, he's a with me always, in my heart. :)

AWESOME LIFE! :)

2010-09-16T16:47:00.002+08:00

Honestly? Blogger is being an arse.
I can't upload Raya picture here. A picture of my family during Hari Raya to be precise.
Well, nevermind. Hari Raya this year was a fun and enjoyable event!
Like more fun than last year all thanks to no Olvls to worry about.
Okay, my exams are over on the last day of puasa, so I was totally with no worries on Hari Raya.
3 days of visiting my relatives house is tiring and not to mention, exhausting!
This year, my official color is blue! My baju raya and not to mention my room is blue.
I wanted everything in my room to be blue but Mummy put a stop to it.
She says I'm totally nuts to have everything in blue color.
& what did I tell her? BLUE IS AWESOME, whether she like it or not.
Hahahs, when it comes to blue, I'm totally going insane. :)
Anyway, I hereby officially announce, I LOVE MY AUNT'S COOKING!!
Like super nice please & I always look forward to first day of Raya, since she live with my grandpa.
Sambal goreng pengantin and ayam masak merah!! FUUUYYOOO!!
SEDAPPPP!! :)
Second & third day not that bad, just that we came back earlier than I expected.
But the good thing is left a few more houses of my relative.
This week is totally gonna be a tiring week.
All my relatives are coming to my house and I have to help Mummy cook.
It's not a bad thing and the best part of all, I get to meet my Chinese relatives too!!
They are an awesome bunch of family members!! :)
Also, next week, I invited my poly mates as well as my sec school friends over.
Gonna have one helluva catching up to do.
& right now, I am watching D-grayman.
Honestly? I didn't know anime cartoons are fun to watch even though they are in Jap.
& not to mention, I miss that someone. Hahhas.
No one will know who and I'm not gonna tell.
Hooya!!! Tomorrow is campfire day & I can't wait to meet my adopted little sister.
& best part of all, I'm bringing cookies for them! :)
This holiday, lots of things on my to-do list!!
First off, I need to set a date for bottle-hunting with my HipHop mates.
Next off, I'm dying for a swim!! Like I need to go swimming & not to mention, my tan is fading off. SHEEEETTTT!!! Anyone wanna go with me??? Not that I know how to swim properly.
The next few things I need to do is go biking, camping and hiking.
Okay, I miss outdoor activities. Poly life makes me unhealthy.
Like totally. Sit air-con classrooms and listen to lectures and bla-bla-bla...
That is so not me. & when classes start, I'm so gonna be high and hyper and not to mention, I'm gonna revise all my modules everyday. I so don't want to be like this sem.
Exams just sucks big time!! Who agree with me??
& I'M CRAVING FOR CHOCOLATES!!
I've been stocking up lots and lots of chocolates and I want this one brand of chocolates but it's damn expensive and so Mummy doesn't want to buy for me.
& for now, I'm officially broke. So anyone want to buy for me Guylian chocolates??
Anyone????
That's all I guess. More updates, sometime next 2 weeks or so.
'Til then, I'm gonna have fun!! Wanna talk to me, just text me or anything!!
Ciaoz!!
I TOTALLY LOVE MY AWESOME LIFE!!

I'M BACKK!! :)

2010-09-01T15:36:00.002+08:00

I'm delicately handing my heart to you, In your caressing hands to forever keep. I'm giving you the chance of destroying me, & I know I'm in your love too deep. I'm giving my entire self to you, All of my mind, heart and soul. Handing over to you my everything, In hopes, you'll be the one to keep me whole. I'm depending on your gentle & sweet love, To get me through the tragic world each day. I'm praying to God you'll always be here by my side, & that's where you'll always be to stay. Putting you over everyone else including myself, you automatically go to the front of my line. Which is why I'm delicately handing you my heart, In hopes, you'll always & eternally, completely be mine.

HEY!!!
Okay, I've not been blogging. But I've got good reasons for not blogging.
Firstly, my exams are coming and hence I'm busy studying. :)
Secondly, I'm busy helping my Mum in preparation for Hari Raya.
Thirdly, I've been helping out in Guides (though not often) at school.
Fourthly, I've been teaching too.
Fifthly,...
Need I continue?? :) Heheh, So many reasons.
Alright, you may say it's excuses but it's valid excuses.
Anyway, nothing much really happen since my last post.
Oh wait, fasting month starts, & guess what????
HARI RAYA IS NEXT WEEKKK!! WEEEEEEE...
I just can't wait but before Hari Raya, are my exams.
I've got like a zillion paper to take starting from tomorrow til next Thursday.
Hahah, just kidding. I've got only 3 papers to take & I've been studying.
So I guess I should say I'm prepared & my first paper is tomorrow.
Maths paper and my second paper will be on next Wed, Chem paper & last is some building paper. Which to me is utterly doesn't make sense at all.
Last week, I've been helping Mum bake cookies, tarts and some more other stuff.
Took 7 days to finish all those baking & not only bake for my relatives, bake for my Dad's friends also. Super Duper tired. But oh well, it's fasting month.
Every year, fasting month always make me feel nostalgic and melancholy.
Well, I keep reflecting on my past & how I shouldn't make those mistakes in the past.
& how I miss this one friend that gave me that poem above.
I realized that he was there throughout almost for my whole sec life.
He was there even when I was being a bitch to him & now, everything seems to be gone.
I really wish/hope/pray (whichever it is) that we can be friends like we used to be.
Well, he's the one who knows me well & in the moments of anger/sadness, I just let him go.
Not even treating him as a friend & I regret that stupid decision of mine.
I'm human after all, making mistakes and everything.
I doubt he'll read this but I just feel like letting everything out.
Right now, I'm embracing whatever that comes my way.
I want to start drawing again and painting again.
It's something that I really love doing but all thanks to that teacher in sec school, I stop.
Painting tends to open my heart to other stuff and makes me believe in things I never believe in.
Well, I'll start drawing again.
I know my posts have short these days but really, I kinda got nothing much to say.
I prefer to keep things to myself these days. Sorry people.
I'll try to update more and write longer posts.
That's all for now, Til I post again. :)
Ciaoz! Wish me luck for my exams! :)

2010-08-07T17:09:00.002+08:00

AWESOME HIP HOP! :)

Okay, first thing off, I'm insane about my HipHop class.

Hahahs. They just rocks big time! Like totally.

But sadly, last week was the last lesson of S&W. :(

No more HipHop, :( . Sad~

Anyway, two common test down and left 3 more exams to go.

Also, term break is heerrrrreee!!!

Weeeee.. Tomorrow I'll start studying already & I definitely want to do well.

Fasting month also coming. I just can't wait.

Okay, I don't feel like posting anymore.

Wait for my mood to come again then I'll update more, yeah?

Tata! :)

LOOK UP THE STARS, THE COLORS SHINE FOR YOU. :]

2010-08-01T16:41:00.003+08:00

Holla! :)
I've taken up to doodling on my drawing blocks again.
Well, this is what life is all about, shades of gray.
I love doodling and I want start drawing again.
Anyway, life has been AWESOME!!! I totally love my life right now.
Without being annoyed, of course.
Let me start off with AWESOME BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION WITH MATES.
On Wednesday, my mates and I went to Mac to have lunch and there, we bought a cake.
A fruity cake with lots of fruits on top of it! :)
At Mac, we had lots of fun, telling each other tricks and jokes and everything.
I mean we really loosen up and laugh like nobody's business.
After EG1 ( which is maths class), we cut the cake and everything.
Honestly, I thought my lecturer is gonna shit brick when we brought the cake into the class.
But instead, know what she did? She took out her phone and took pictures!
Super cute. *Whip out phone and start taking pictures*
Hahahs. I was there with my mouth hanging open.
Then birthday kids tried cutting the cake and all fail please.
The cake become don't know what but edible though.
And poor Ke Hong who got chase by two mates of mine, smashing cake on his face even though it's not his birthday that day. Such a fun day. :)
On Friday, Sayang, KY and me went to Sembawang Beach where the guides had their farewell.
& goshness, I saw Sabrin, Hillary and Cindy! :)
I miss them so much and life without them was weird.
Especially Sabrin, no one to bitch around with or talk dirty with. Hahahs.
I miss teasing that shortie also. I wanna go camp again with them.

Classes was okay. This week all revision.
No need to attend also can. Just mark attendance and go off.
CT on Tuesday & Friday and right now, I'm rushing off my report due on Friday.
I want to get it done asap. & not to mention my presentation slides, presenting on Wednesday.
Thursday having dance friendly competition among groups in class.
Well, my group dancing run devil run by SNSD.
I just hope we don't screw up & honestly, the guys dance so funny! :X
& I really think the guys should wear high heels to make them taller.
Hahahs. Meeting WeiEn on Tuesday and get some stuff from her.
OMG, I can't wait to meet her though. It's been awhile since I last saw her.
Not to mention that Shamala. I haven pass her presents to her.
I bake for her cookies and still haven pass her yet.
I really hope I'll see her on Wednesday morning though.
Oh ya, Arvind's birthday coming & gonna bash him upside down, inside out. :)
More fun coming up & next week, start study break. I totally can't wait.
In 3 weeks time, my exams start, then Hari Raya & then vacation.
Gonna go off to Malaysia for study trip, workshops and gonna go out with friends! :)
Oh ya, Should I work as tutor or as a trainer in camps?
Which one? Decisions, decisions, decisions.
Gonna watch The Last Airbender this week with my siblings. :)
Alrighty! Ciaoz!
More updates after my CT/exams! :)

BUSYYYY!!

2010-07-22T20:40:00.003+08:00

Oh freak. I have not been posting here.

Gah, so busy til I have no time to blog anymore. Even my tumblr seems to be dead.

Well, today was my jumpstart challenge & IT'S AWESOME!!

I don't know why people are saying it's not fun at all when it's fun.

My teammates & I laugh like mad just now & presentation was okay la.

Guess what? I finally have no stage fright already! WooHoo!

Anyway, past weeks, been having lots & lots & lots of presentation, assignments, projects & not to mention quizs! Like serioulsy, FML.

But finally, all of that is over and left one last teeny weeny presentation on next week Wed.

After that, no more but have to concentrate on my exams & CT again.

I'm so looking forward to the afterwards where I got 6 weeks of vacation.

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...

Hahhahas.. Tmr, damn sian, 1 hour of tutorial and done for the day.

S&W still got 2 more lessons & TGFT. I really love hip-hopping. :)

Well, more updates tmr perhaps. I'm tireed & could barely keep my eyes open.

Later than!

Ciaoz!

I WANT CREAMERY ISLAND!! :(

ROCK TO ME!!

2010-07-11T15:57:00.002+08:00

Hey!! :)

Okay, truly, I've been neglecting my blog eversince I got a tumblr now.

Well, the thing is tumblr is so much easier to use compared to blogger but no way am I gonna delete this blog. It holds too much memories for me. :)

Anyway, classes been great, all thanks to me not paying attention. Cool huh?

& know what? A lecturer of mine count my marks wrongly.

I was suppose to get B but I got C. Thank goodness, he realises it before he key in the marks.

If not, I'll scream at him! Oh ya, Bridge is such a failure.

Like totally can't withstand 1kg. So what the hell. But my group do pass the project.

All thanks to our unique design. :)

Also, HE's being sweeet throughout the whole thing. Oh well.

No side-tracking during this poly years.

I've just finish doing all my work except ECA project.

Well, I find all my projects a pain in the arse. Like totally.

Feels like as though I've been doing more work than having fun.

Last Friday, went to watch eclipse with my friends.

Well, the movie was awesome but the school girls behind us was damn annoying!

They were like chanting, "kiss kiss kiss" all the way, throughout the whole movie.

Like freaking immature & damn annoying with a capital A! Gah.

Many times I said shut the fuck up but I think they deaf, can't hear.

Oh well, I've been having STM lately. Can't remember what I did for the past week.

After movie, I went down to NVSS to see the guides & gah, kinda miss their cheerfullness.

I realised that I never show who I really am in Poly, except for the part I like to disturb people alot. Other than that, I never really behave the way I really am.

& mind you, I realise this on Friday when I was overwhelme by the guides carefree way.

OH YA, speaking of GUIDES, TENGTENG, if you're reading this, which I bet you are, Mrs Ong need your help next week, that's it if you got no class. Supervise some of the kids.

I guess that's all for now. I'll try myy best to blog every now & then.

'Til then! :)

Ciaoz! :]

Ps I WANNNNNTTT ICE-CREAMS!!

LIFE IS A HIGHWAY

2010-07-04T16:19:00.003+08:00

BOO!

Omg, I feel so freaking tired this weekend & this is the first weekend, I woke up damn damn late. Classes last week was a nightmare. A big fat nightmare.

ECA, we had to do individual virtual assignment and hand it in by tmr.

No classes for the week though. But it's exhausting.

FME & FCE all done, thank goodness.

Creamery ice-cream with Agatha, KahYarn & YT was fun.

Well, if anyone went there, you can see our faces on the wall. :)

Seriously, I don't know what to blog about.

My mind is having a mental breakdown right now.

Gah, & my brother is being irritating & I guess this is what happens when you're too tired.

Being over-crazy and irritating. It happens to me several times though.

Dinner at SP, Hadi owe us big time!!!

We met up with Brandon only & had KFC & we talk about who-ever comes to mind.

& I'm beginning to think that last week was a sick week.

I was sick & recovering on my own when rain drops on me AGAIN!

Damn irritated sia but now, I'm okay already.

Just that I need my sleep more than ever. Not to mention, studying for upcoming tests.

Damn fucked-up sia. & oh ya, good news!! :)

I pass all my CTs! First CT & I pass all! Celebrate!!! :)

ECA-68 (like who cares? It's chemistry!), FME-69, EG1-83, ECO-82. :)

I love Eco man! BIOLOGY!! & oh ya, I was the highest in class!

Congrats to me & i'll definitely work super duper hard for ECO.

Biology just appeals to me so damn much ah. :)

Okay, that's it. I'm starving right now.

I'm gonna have my dinner & pig myself out right now.

Ciaoz! Another week of classes. JY, fitri! Hang in there! :)

Term Break coming to an end.

2010-06-26T15:32:00.003+08:00

Hey!

It's been a long time since I last post.

Lots of things have happen & I've tried to upload some pictures but blogger's being a pain in the arse again. It always have been. -.-

Anyway, projects all almost complete, just needed the final touch-up & all is good to go.

The bridge is not that stable but atleast pasted to each other, the parts.

FME, the web thingy, is almost done, tmr check it up, & woots, done.

Tuesday, went hiking to Henderson wave with the girls & It's kinda fun.

I have to say, it's definitely well prepared & good job to the ones in charged. :)

The seniors all there also, Shamini, Bernice, Jasmine, Ruiting, Yuting & me.

6 of us & honestly, we made ourselves super high & sing while hiking up & down the bridges.

After that, Mrs Ong & Miss Suganthi treat us to lunch at Swensen & since it's Mrs Ong's birthday the previous day, Miss Suganthi bought her a cake. & the best part is the cream cake.

All of us scrap off the cream & Shamini smash it to Mrs Ong's face.

Hahahhs.. That was super fun & hilarious too, their reactions.

Tuesday went to Sentosa with Brandon, Arvind, GJ, Shimin, BQ & Weien.

& gee, they tried throwing me into the sea but can't manage. Hahhahs. :)

I keep kicking them until they have to let me go. & I learn something too.

Like BQ don't know how to swim! Hhahahs. :)

Must teach him how to swim & lol, I also don't know how to swim.

Each time, my feet can't touch the ground, I'll grab onto whoever is near me.

& oh ya, I got sun-burn. It hurts the next day but now my skin start peeling & didn't hurt anymore. :) Cool but it's still red though. Oh well, lotions!! :)

Water project was kinda okay, just did lots of experiment & we start late.

All thanks to the rainfall that is so heavy.

& NP bus-stop, the shelter there was flooded & I did an unglam thing.

I took off my shoes, roll up my jeans & walk into the water.

A few of the students were there & watch me wade throught the water but who cares.

I don't wanna wet my shoes totally. Gah.. Kinda dislike the rain.

Oh well, today & tomorrow, time for me to rest.

& oh ya, i got my ECA back. Didn't do so well though. Like I got 68% out of 100.

& highest is 90% I think.

Motivation for me to study more. :)

That's it. Later then!

CIAOZ! :)

2 more days to enjoy & sleep more. :)

RE-WINDDDD!!

2010-06-16T21:07:00.003+08:00

Woohhoooo!!
23 JUNE is coming fast & I just can't wait!!
But sian, 25 June got water project, don't feel like going but have to.
Anyway, projects are a PAIN IN THE ASS!!
Like seriously, the dammit bridge project, so difficult to build.
Using satay sticks!!! To build a bridge to withstand a load of 300N which is also 30KG!
Damn siao la & the length have to be atleast 65cm!
Walao, damn pain in the butt.
Can't wait to get this over & done with. My mates are coming my house on Monday to complete it. Hopefully complete it & can just dump it one side.
Another project is FME, explain about standby generator & all that bullshit.
Seriously, I'm beginning to think why the hell do I need to study all this bull??
Aaarghhhh.... *meltdown*

Oh ya, Term break are great.
Okay, first thing first, I went to catch a transformer show at Plaza Sing.
I mean I was there & might as well watch the show. hahhahs..
It's kinda fun & kinda miss being a kid.
Then recently I bake cookies. Okay, suppose to give Sham some but hey got no time.
& I guess WE is out, overseas since she didn't reply my comments at fb.
& Celestine is back!!! So happy, she was back yesterday. :)
& I saw Iman yesterday & he's calling me names again!! LOL.
Been talking to someone & hell yeah, I don't know what to think of it.
No point thinking too much right??
Just live today to its fullest & let tomorrow take care of itself. :)
My new rule to live by. hahhahs.. :)
& oh ya, I can't believe I'll be dancing to the song Run Devil Run/Gee.
Either one.. Oh gosh, I'll try my best even if I do look weird. -.-
Right now, I just want to get into my loving comfy bed.
Can't sleep last night & I don't know why, been thinking alot.
My eyes are sleeping & saying goodnight soon.
I feel like taking a walk down my blk to enjoy the serene night air.
Should I sneak out again?? hahhas.. My rebellious streak coming back again.
Oh well.. Maybe I'll. :)
Thats all, til the next time which I don't know when I'll post!
Ciaoz!

p.s. I need to complete project by next week.
p.s.s. Sentosa coming my way soon.
p.s.s.s. I need to go back NVSS & get my damn UH warrant!
p.s.s.s.s. I need to stop thinking about that person!!
p.s.s.s.s.s. Stop having so many psssss!

CT FINALLY ENDS & TERM BREAK, HERE I COME!

2010-06-09T13:24:00.003+08:00

Hey! Finally!!!

I'm done with CT!! From today onwards start my hols!! :)

Okay, it's term break actually.

After the last CT just now, my mates are discussing the answers & know what Chin Ee & I were doing? We were singing Twinkle Twinkle Litte Star. So funny ah.

Then the other time in FCE lesson, we were singing 'as the cold wind blow..'

& the faci saw me singing & thought I was talking & he was explaining some drill thing & he say he'll put me in it 'cos I was talking. Damn hilarious. & we were singing that song due to the cold air from the air-con blowing at us. Hhahhahs.. Fun time in class! :)

But right now, need to do alot of things but so little time. :(

Oh well, shall make good use of it.

Today, more like tonight, is the day my dearest adopted sister flying to Japan!

Isn't it great?? I hope she'll have lots of fun there, meet some cute guys & buy me some sourvenirs. Hahhahs.. Kidding about the last part. :)

Oh gosh, I miss her lots. It's been a loooooonng time since I last seen her.

Like the last time was in April, I think.

Time to spend some lovely time back with GG.

Anway, I have not collected my UH warrant also. Like diao.

I paid for the course but have to go to my guider to collect it. "=.=

Time to take a trip back to NVSS.

& oh hell, Mdm Koh already left the school. :(

I didn't even get to say goodbye, thank you very much for your encouragement & I love you lots!

I just hope she'll visit NVSS from time to time.

This term break is so gonna be a busy one.

Like there's lots of events going on this year.

I wanna go Victoria Theater, Marine Barrage, Sentosa, City Square, Vivo City & many others.

So many places to go! Just can't wait! :)

Oh ya, must not forget my projects. Hahhas.. 4 projects to undergo, 2 unimportant & 2 impt.

Shall plan my time wisely. Can't wait for 23June where I'll meet my beloved friends.

& Muahahahha, birthday bash coming his way but he won't expect it. :)

Okay, I feel so evil now. Hahhahs..

I went to Orchard on last saturday & totally feel in love with COTTON ON!!

The sale there, woaaahh.... I just love it! :)

Wanna shop & buy but unfornately, I've got a budget. *sigh*

But no worries! There's always next time! :)

I feel so much happier now & I guess due to Ct's over & I kind of don't want to think about him being miserable due to some problems he faced.

So I shall make the best out of life & get a life & enjoy it to the fullest! :)

Ciaoz!

Start Of CT!! :(

2010-06-04T14:30:00.003+08:00

Hey!
Today start of CT! I'm freaking nervous.
I definitely don't want to fail my modules. What to do?
What to do? Scared & nervous is not good. haiis..
Must relax, calm down, take deep deep breath...
Wish me luck people! :(

MySpace

2010-06-02T14:07:00.003+08:00

Heyhey! :)
Currently at MySpace, just slacking around. Okay, I'm suppose to be studying but I so sick of studying & hence,, decided to slack around for now. Later having 2 hours of EG1 which is maths class. Theresa the lecturer & I guess class will be hilarious again.
These past few days, feeling so super tired all thanks to studying 'til late night.
Eco CT is this Friday, damn sian la. But thankfully, I studied Biology in secondary school, so it's not that tough on me. I don't think I can make it for ECA though.
Like there's plenty of chemistry stuff to read on & FME so many theories. I just hate it when there's alot of quizes and projects to be done with.
Gosh, only about 2 months of classes & I'm sick of it. Time to re-think about my future.
Saw YT & Chew in the morning. Well, I didn't know they were in the same bus as me.
I'm super-blurr today. :(

Honestly, I'm in a sad mood today.
Well, stuff happen, & poof, it suddenly affect me.
Hate this kind of feeling, like I feel so helpless & can't do anything about it.
I told myself before poly starts, can't fall in love & I did just that.
How stupid is that huh?
Perhaps not stupid, just nature taking place. The best thing is that the person I fall for is not in NP. It's someone that I shouldn't fall in love with.
Life's a freaking bitch when it comes to this.
I'm just gonna ignore the feeling and just go on with life like nothing happen.
I just hope no one will notice the change whenever I'm around him.
& I know nothing will come out of it cos we're not meant to be.
Whatever.

Just can't help the feeling of being helpless about it & that makes me sad. :(
No One can help me get this feeling off except for myself.

MONDAY IS COMING! :)

2010-05-30T15:54:00.003+08:00

Heyhey!! :)

OMG, Tomorrow is already Monday & 4 more days to the start of CT!!

Sharks!! I so need to study right now!!!

Anyway, i'm so super outdated when it comes to my BFF!

What the heck? Too busy with school stuff 'til forgot to update myself.

Oh well, 23 JUNE!!! SENNTTOOOSSAA!! :)

WooHoo!! Can't wait. Well, I invited Brandon, BQ, Gary, WE, Sham, Arvind, Shimin, GJ, Sabrin, Amirul & Dayana. Hahahs.. Random choice but hey, go there have fun! :)

Oh ya, not forgetting, Dylan Nah! :)

Swimminnng!! SUN, SEA & SAND!! Can't wait.

Oh ya, to this person out there, no point saving our friendship when you don't make the effort.

I don't give a damn anymore & I don't bother.

So if you wanna ask why to me, DON'T. I don't care anymore.

That's all for now.

'Til after CT week! Gonna Chioongg ah!! :(

It's you, the one who didn't even realised it.

But I know I have no chances at all & so I'm not gonna hope for much.

NEW UPDATES! :]

2010-05-29T16:26:00.003+08:00

Hey!!

Hahahhs.. Been a long long time since I last updated.

Feels like eons of years! Anyway, all is well & it's been fun in classes.

Only that CT is starting next Friday, 04 of June! Haiis..

Time really flies damn damn fast. Oh well, no worries, I'm already revising my ass off already.

ECO, FME, ECA & lastly, EG1.

EG1 classes are all hilarious, the faci so funny ah, keep repeating & there's this one time, she blames us for being so slow when she's the one who teach so slow.

& all of us were like, 'You're the one teach so slow, still blame us.'

Last Wednesday, I went to NP's gym & I didn't know that we have to go for gym orientation in order to use the grm equipments. Thank goodness, when Joey & I arrived, a session of gym orientation was being conducted. *Phew* But unfortunately, my other friends who are behind us didn't manage to use the gym. They arrived when the orientation already ends. :(

Oh wekk, next time then! & after about 2hours spend in the gym, we went to have lunch at Canteen 2. OMG, the iced coffee there is NICEEE!!!

ICED COFFEE WITH FRESH MILK! Must have it every morning!

Hahhahs... Thursday, HipHop was fun too! Like totally, we learn whacking & now all my arms still pain from whacking! Hahhahs.. Joey so funny, keep whacking here & there. :)

Been sms-ing gay boy & hehehhes... tsktsk. My lips are sealed. :)

And dammit, when is Dylan getting a phone??

So difficult to contact him nowadays! >:(

Oh ya, TERM BREAK COMING!

Sentosa on 16 June, everyone's invited!! :)

Okay, timing still not confirm, but it'll be soon!

Weeee..... 2 more weeks of classes, 1 week is CT week, & I'm off for term break!

Just can't wait!

Love is weird.

Each time, it's always the wrong person.

Trip, Trip! :)

2010-05-21T21:09:00.003+08:00

Heyhey! :)

Today is such an awesome day ever but hilarious too!

Well, my group mates for eco class went to Sungei Buloh today to experience the wetland first hand. After an hour class of FME & definitely after lunch, we took buses to reach there.

& the bus service only goes straight to the entrance only on Sundays.

So we have to walk for 15minutes (more like half an hour) to the entrance & along the way, there's guard dogs & we almost got chase by them, thanks to my friend who pull my shirt & want to run far far away from it. Thank goodness, Daddy aka Titus, was there to save the day.

He told us not to look at the dog & walk away calmly.

I was so freaking scared already & my heart was like racing.

Thankfully, it didn't chase us or bite us.

On the way back out, we were prepared & hence no barking was heard.

Pheww, tomorrow another group is going there & I bet they'll experience the same thing as us.

At Sungei Buloh, there's like nothing much but we did saw monitor lizard & squirell.

The squirell suoer cute please! It camoflauges with the tree barks so when we took picture of it, can't really see. But still, SOOOO CUUTTEE!! :)

Last few days, lesson was fun!

& during practical on Wed, we kinda play in the lab. hahhas..

All thanks to that LipYong ah, keep poking people when he himself is scared.

He's nice ah but other times, he's just debate with me. But everytime, he'll say I bully him when it's like vice-versa. And oh ya, 2 of my mates like having conflict all due to each differences.

Honestly, I don't know what to do or what to judge and so on.

To me, both parties are at fault & seriously, we can't only bother about ourself only.

We have to care about others as well, as in their feelings and opinions.

I really don't know what to do. I just don't want my mates to fall apart.

I mean they are awesome to me & I got along well. It's just that my other mates don't.

Well, how to solve this problem? I really don't know.

Right now, i'm freaking busy with Eco project since presentation is being push to next Tuesday & not to mention my Common Test that's looming like a death sentence.

& I talk to this senior in another course & he told me that all EWT students are like super smart compared to other BE courses & I really wonder if I'm smart enough?

Sometimes, my mates are too smart til I feel stupid among them but these are just my thoughts.

They are nice, esp Benny, & they help me with stuff I don't know.

I guess I'm definitely lucky to have them as my mates & I'll treasure what memories and friendships I have with them. :) Our first trip to overseas is coming up soon, in Oct.

& our first field trip which is water project trip is in June.

I hope that everything, the conflicts and unhappy things are solved by then.

'Til then! :)

Ciaoz!

2010-05-16T14:45:00.002+08:00

HeyHey! :)

Finally, I can upload pictures. Actually, wanted to upload more pictures but just lazy.

These are my AWESOME-SS GIRL MATES! :)

There's one more, Joey but she's not in the picture. But it's alright, more pics coming up! :)

This weeeekkk, supper enjoyable! :) Honesttly, every week is super fun & awesome!

Know why? All because of me being there! Hahhas.. I'm being BHB. Don't mind me.

Classes this week is like normal, study and laugh and disturb.

I love all my lecturers even thought sometimes I wonder why the hell am I studying this module. But oh well, out of my five modules + 2 elective modules, only 3 are examnable!

Cool huh? Like totally! :) But there are plenty of chapters & hence have to revise every night.

& now I've got 5 NP shirts and still collecting!

I love my canteen 3 food too! All the food there is like GOOD FOOD!

Not to mention, beloved MAKAN PLACE! :)

Oh! I've got a Best Friend in class. Yeah, i know it's too soon but I got along well with him.

And yes my best friend is a him & no, I only treat him as a friend, more like a brother. :)

Well, as time passes, my attitude changed slightly. That i realised.

I don't know why but I just hope that I changed for the better & not worst.

Anyway, Mother's Day has already pass. & I treat Mummy on Thursday.

Well, even though it's just a coffee shop but what matters the most is the thoughts!

I love my Mummy lots! She's like the best! She's always there for me & even though sometimes my attitude toward her sucks, she's always have patience towards it.

I realised that a month has pass & I've been attending classes for a month already! :)

Clap hands for me for adjusting to poly life already.

I love the timing of my timetable, my friends there, the jokes, the fun among my mates & not to mention, seeing someone there everyday (not really everyday).

3 more weeks and there'll be common test! After that 2 weeks of term break.

Due to YOG, poly will have lots of break this year & I wanted to help at YOG but Mummy says to think carefully cause it's on fasting month. So in the end, I didn't sign up for it.

Nevermind, shall use that time to study & catch up with my other friends.

I wonder how they are doing.. Hmm... I do miss camps too!

Poly life like no camps! :( I want lots & lots & lots of camp & I wanna spend more time under the bright shiny sun! People have been talking to me in CHINESE!

Ugghh, especially drink stall aunties! Need to learn chinese soon. Who wanna teach me? :)

I guess that's all for now. More updates coming up real soon!

For now, ciaoz! :)

Enjoy life to the fullest!

2010-05-06T20:19:00.002+08:00

Hey Hey Hey!

Today's post will be a quick post. I was suppose to watch Merlin but here I am, blogging.

Anyway, these past days have been great. Fun, Fun & more Fun! :)

Hahhhs, I mean I laugh alot during classes & if I don't get it, I'll start sprouting nonsence.

Funniest lessons ever will always be EG1. Hilarious.

& I'm comfortable with one of my mates. Like super pls.

Like as if I've known him for years. Well, I treat him as my big brother in class. :)

Last few days also have alot of Quizes. & tomorrow, presentation on Eco.

My group pps is almost done, well, left only on what we each have to say.

Presentation suppose to be 1 person only but all of us enthu, wanna present also.

Made friends with one of my GM & very diao, I keep seeing him during my breaks & he don't even recognise me at all. On MSN, still can ask, "you're?"

Funny part is that he can say he's in BE & I was giving him -.- face.

Like i'm in BE also but diff course only lor.

Oh ya, today I forgot to bring my ez-link card & thank goodness daddy's not working today.

So he fetch me instead & I also forgot to bring my wallet & hence, I'm moneyless too.

& ya, Tuesday is super freaky! Like Alwin send me a letter to my home.

Regarding what happen in FB. Like what the heck ah!

I'm so freak out when I saw that!

Anw, today, HIP HOP ROCKS! Like totally! :)

I learn how to loosen up & flow with the bead! & I know how to do body wave!

WooHoo!! Next time, go clubbing can dance properly liao! :)

S&W is forever fun but I kinda don't like my Jumpstart mates.

Like they very bo liao ah. Not enthu at all.

Well, my first group was okay but second grp like wth.

Err.. whatever. It's only for temporary, can't wait for it to end!

& this is to that person out there.

Seriously now I'm beginning to think that whatever you say to me last time are all lies.

Like totally lies! & thank goodness nothing else happen.

Now my impression of you is that whatever that comes out of your mouth are all lies.

Liar Liar Your Fucking Pants On Fire!

2010-05-01T16:56:00.002+08:00

Hey!! :)

This week has been a fun & interesting week.

Basically every week is fun, hilarious & awesomess!

Hahahs, yesterday was the best day though. I didn't attend one of my classes cos it was optional. Cool huh? So I went home early & slept the whole later part of the day.

Even Daddy sms me also, I didn't reply.

Wednesday, my friends and I attended the BE international!

So hilarious, all of us attended that event due to the good food. :)

As well as free food! Played some games & make new friends.

But almost all the time is I disturb my classmate name MAT.

Well, his name is Lip Yong but I call him Mat cos he dress like one.

& he just doesn't want to accept the fact that he's the same height as me.

Like he say he's taller than me & keep calling me 'pendek'.

Other than that, everything was normal, just that I keep seeing Monday Guy.

Hahs, Joey says it's Odd Day Guy since I see him on Odd Days.

Thursday, I had my S&W. & Hip Hop is AWESOME!

Justice taught us 1 move & honestly, I don't really know how to dance.

But after one day in hip hop class, I kinda loosen up.

Like who cares if there's guys watching me dance so badly.

As long as my guys mates are not there, I don't really care. :)

Seriously, my guy mates will tease me 'til the end la.

Jumpstart is also fun! Build roller coaster & it work!:)

Hahhas, tried to upload the pictures but blogger is shitting on me again.

And finally, I bought my contact lens! :) No more specs or frost! :)

Hahhas, practical for FME was hilarious too. Well, everyone copied each other.

And some of us even calculate wrongly, like diao. -.-

EG1 was fun! The lecturer so funny, only have selective hearing and everything.

& she loves to pick on me whenever I sit on the outside (not near the wall).

Well, I've already did her work & i'll be teaching one of my mate but she thought I'm talking.

Like hello? She teach 'til so complicated, all the unnecessary stuff & everything.

Well, thats all. i just realized i've got 1 more assignment to do which is FME graph.

I don't know how I'm going to draw it.

Oh ya, almost forget about my another project. Presentation this week.

Crap! Going home late this week. Have to finish my project with mates.

Thats all for now! :) I'm so looking forward to Monday.

Oh ya, gonna work super hard & CCA points, I'll get them by participating in activities.

For now, gonna revise ECA! :)

Ciaoz!

2010-04-25T16:07:00.002+08:00

Hey!!

I'm back again & am definitely to blog about the past events.

First week of school was fun as well as tiring.

Well, my classmates are AWESOME! :)

Cool huh? & there's this classmate, Joey, she's funny.

In the middle of the class, out of the blue, she suddenly laugh, frightening everyone.

& it was so random, all of us start laughing. & this was during ecology.

First day was a day to remember! We got lost in NP & make one big round to find blk56.

And woah, there's like assignments, lots of it!

& wed, already have presentation! & today, I've just finish 2 of my assignments. phew!

Lessons are all okay, esp FME! I just love it! It's all about PHYSICS!

And there's another classmate of mine, JJ, he loves to bully/disturb me a lot!

Almost every time, we'll have a war against each other & debate like nobody's business.

But hey, he's a great friend. & another guy whom I labelled him as MAT, due to the way he dress and so on. So funny ah, he's a chinese but I kept talking to him in malay.

he didn't even know what the heck I'm talking about.

So far, I've talk to all my classmates and they are fun people to be with.

They gonna be stuck with me for 3 years & i know they are AWESOME people! :)

CCAs, I joined the ambassador and wanted to join Netball but the hours, tsk.

So late til 9.30pm. if there's no assignments, I'm fine with it.

But if there's, I'm totally dead!

Yesterday, I already completed my UH course & i'll get the warrant sometime this week.

They'll either post it to my home add or school which means that I'll have to go to school to get it.

Sian. Their promotion was great from what I heard.

Oh well, maybe they'll be able to get Gold award again.

Time to help out again at NVSS GG unit.

Anyway, Poly life offers lots of good stuff and I just can't wait to pass my 1st year and get to 2nd year. Who knows, by the time 2nd year, all of us will be high & crazy!

I wanna be high & crazy but then if I'm the only one, it'll look super weird.

Oh well, thats all.

Any more updates will be done sometime soon. :)

Peace out!

2010-04-21T14:41:00.002+08:00

Heyheyhey!!

i'm currently in the library, already finish doing my Amaths homework.

And yes, i'm doing Amaths AGAIN!

I've not blog for a long time & boy, I guess there's alot to update about.

Anyway, first day already got assignment. So sian!

Oh crap, blog later. Tata!

FUN, JOY, PEACE & LAUGHTER!

2010-04-14T14:27:00.002+08:00

1G01 RAWKS!!!
Hahhas, FIP was extremely fun and enjoying.
Well, at first I thought it's gonna be sooo boring but how wrong I was!
Anyway, I'm in class 1G01 and my classmates are AWESOME!
Hahhs.. I'm so happy that I got into a class that are great and friendly as well.
Both days, we had lectures, played bonding games & had amazing race on the 2nd day.
Amazing race is torture for me, since I've not been exercising for 6months already.
Have to run here and there, around the school.
Funniest part was when my class was playing the balloon game.
I can't burst the damn balloon and whenever I tried, I bounce back from the balloon.
And the GM laugh at me. Tsk..
Then there're several people who look like my friends.
There's this guy who look like SK, another look like the twins, a girl who look like Kak Sweet.
At first glance, I really thought it's them but another glance told me it's not them.
Hahahs, oh well. Back to my FIP. My class only have 6 girls and around 10 guys.
We, girls, are all abit high and we get along well with each other.
The guys were okay but we, girls, didn't really get to know them.
They are actually shy and gee, the girls have to make the first step and talk to them first.
But overall, every activities are fun and I guess my class are GREAT!
And many thanks to the SL, Denise, Soon Lai & Andy (even though he ps us to help another class), they rawks and made us bond with each other. :]
Fun, fun, fun... Just can't wait for more fun stuff to happen! :)
BE rock on!!!

Anyway, I've already receive my timetable!
And hahahs, I won't be able to come down and help guides anymore.
Oppssiiiee, I don't intend to help anymore if thats the way they do things.
Monday, Wed & Friday, going home at 5pm..
The rest is earlier than 5pm and the only day I'm going to school late is on Monday.
Which is great ah, if not, die liao...
And I can go back with sayang on some days! :]
Hmm.. my advisor is great, nice lecturer and my building not that far away also.
Quite near to entrance or let's just say gate.
And oh ya, funny part, there's this guy who's damn damn nice.
But oh well, not interested in having bf until I finish my studies.
For now is study study and study!
Next week, 24 april already! Can't wait for UH course!
Can meet my friends again and oh ya, this Friday, Speech Day.
Their marching? Don't care, don't bother. Thats my style! :]
That will be the last event I'm attending 'til the next time which I don't know when.
For now, I just can't wait for school to start! :]

SEVENTEEN TODAY!

2010-04-09T12:01:00.002+08:00

Hooyaa!
Today is the day I turn 17! Woots! So happy.
Besides, so many things happen that makes me extremely happy! :]
I feel like smiling non-stop & shouting to the world how happy I am.
Hahahas, then people will think I'm siao!
Poly is so gonna start soon, left 1 week to enjoy my hols.
And I've my induction on 12 & 13 April which is coming Monday & Tuesday.
Well, honestly? I can't wait for it to come but at the same time, I'm nervous.
Like what kind of people will I meet at my course?
My lappy gonna arrived real real soon & not to mention, 24 april is coming soon.
And oh ya, I pray hard that I'll be able to go Nat camp this year!
That should be all. It's a short post & i'll update more sometime soon.
As for now, I'm gonna stay happy all day long! :]
And,
"I'll keep that child in me because she will always see the rainbows in the dark skies."

BACK IN ACTION!

2010-04-01T15:03:00.011+08:00

Hooooooooola!
Hahahs, I'm definitely feeling much better after afew days of being busy and happy! :)
And finally, today I can online and check all my emails.
After what happen on last Monday, now must take good care of myself.
Last Friday, went to Aunt's house to deliver 'hantaran' gift for my cousin's wedding.
And yeah, my last closest cousin, Abang Ami, have gotten married last Sat.
Saturday, I went for Unit Helper(UH) course & super extremely fun! :)
Ms Hasna is so funny ah & there, met other YAs from other school.
We talk, play games & at the end of the course, I learn lots of new things.
Not only that, there's food there also & I'm getting my UH warrant after I complete the course.
So can't wait for 24 April to come. I wish it come faster.
After I went for the course, whenever I come back to NVS guide unit, I feel as though I can't be bothered with them anymore. At HQ, it's more fun compared to the unit ah. Oh well...

After the course, I went to my Aunt's house at Marymount to attend dinner wedding.
Met all my Uncles, Aunts & Cousins. All the food is super nice & saw the bride & groom also.
Congrats to them & Welcome to the fam, Kak Yanie! :)
Sunday, more fun & woah, all my Mak Ciks all wear like a so-called Uniform!
Red like celebrating Chinese New Year! (Merah menyala!) Hahahs...
Then, my brothers, cousins & I went to the bride's side to fetch the bride.
But before that, I saw that someone. & he really made my day.
Those smiles and looks, (sigh..) really can't be compared to anyone else.
Anyway, back to the wedding, he too followed to the bride's side.
And the bride's side, the food damn nice ah.
Below are some pictures taken on Sunday! :)

Aunties, Cousins & Nieces in red.

My aunties. :]

Cousins!

Groom's sister & my close cousin too!

First Aunt & Cousin Omar. :]

Tuesday, Mummy & I went to Nenek Ani's house to deliver some fish.

All thanks to Ridduan, my dearest brother, now my fam have to eat lots & lots of fish.

He went fishing with Daddy & caught 2 one-meter fish.

Mummy already gave some away but still got lots left. Gah.

I kinda dont like to eat fish. I prefer red meat. Suffering at home.

Especially during meal times. Mummy no choice have to cook fish everyday.

I told my brother never to go fishing again. If he go also, go catch small fish.

And not big fish that can't be finish.

Next week is gonna be an interesting week with all the happenings.

Jasmine & Tengteng funny ah. Always love to punish the guides. Tsk.

Thats the job they love the most. Aiyoo.. Hahhs..

Oh ya, Celestine! I've got something for you & I forgot to pass to you that time.

I'll pass it to you next week, Friday! :)

And today, I receive a letter from my poly, reminding me of my FIP.

Like as if I'll forget & I can't wait to get my lappy. Hmm.. what shall I name it??

It gonna arrived on 12 April which is 2 weeks from now! Can't wait!!

My own personal lappy! Yay! No more sharing com with my brothers! :)

Happy is in me now & always & I hate it when people make me piss off.

Gah, oh well, thats all for now. Gonna either go out or get some more sleep.

Miss my sleep so much! :o

Ps 1 more week to my birthday! :)

PPs 2 more week to FIP!

PPPs 3 more week to school reopen!

PPPPs 4 more week to completing UH course!

PPPPPs No more ppppppps!!

RUN AWAY WITH ME, ANYONE?

2010-03-23T12:55:00.002+08:00

Hey..
Blogger just died on me just now.
I wanna upload afew pictures but can't. Feel like just changing to LJ.
Anyway, PLTC '10 was great & certain things are decided already.
But still, I'm beginning to have second thoughts. Oh well, none of my probs.
Yesterday, am sick, so this week is stay home week.
Can't even make it out of the house to go buy lunch. Haiiss...
This weekend also have the UH camp, don't know if I can make it or not.
Besides, all the details not yet confirm, not to mention the fees.
Meanwhile, Friday gonna go to my Aunt's place to visit her.
This weekend can't make it to cousin's wedding.
That's all ba. Don't feel like blogging anymore.
I'll just MIA for a while.

Anyone wanna run away with me?

RELAPSE!

2010-03-23T12:25:00.003+08:00

Relapse. It sucks when it happen every once a year.
This year, it happen yesterday & whenever it happen, I'll always feel emotionally vulnerable afterwards. I hate that kind of feelings.
For the last few years, I've already tried my best to control emotions, feelings, so that when this relapse happens again, I'll not be emotional.
It always leave me feeling scared and afraid of what will happen if I just follow the darkness that keeps pulling me in. I'm tired of fighting the darkness & yesterday was the same like last year.
It all started when I was Sec 3, I lost control of my emotions. & relapse occurs.
Fuck the illness I have that leaves me weak. So fustrated and irritated by it.
Why am I the one among my sblings affected by it the most?
Why can't I just be normal like any other people?
I'm afraid to think of what my parents will feel/do if they know I'm tired of fighting it.
Judging from yesterday, my mum was so afraid that I'll just fade into unconsiciousness and hence she keep pinching me to keep me from closing my eyes.
At times, I hate myself for being what I am and I wasnt given a choice to do anything about it.
I just hate being so weak that I can't do anything to even save my own live.

2010-03-16T04:25:00.002+08:00

I've just finish watching A walk to remember & it reminds me of all those happy & precious times I had with my loved ones. Hurting someone I care is not something I want to do.
But when it's really meant not to be, it is really meant not to be. Everything lies on fate which in turns lies in the hands of God. But today, I'm telling myself not to ever walk into the path of love again until I'm ready. Things that have passed, can't be change. Forgive me if I hurt your feelings too deeply.

Ps How I wish the girl wnt have to die, leaving the guy alone. Such a sad story but with great meaning in it.

2010-03-16T02:41:00.005+08:00

Boooyyyyaahhhhh....
Here I am again at 2:43 am in the morning & i'm still wide awake.
Hohoho... The coffee that mummy made for me & YT is almost finish.
Mainly, I'm the one drinking it like no body business.
Thats why I'm still wide-awake right now. :)
And I'm the 16-people's guardian angel (more like baby-sitter).
Celestine is just beside me, sleeping her ass off.
We're suppose to share her sleeping bag together but she's off solo.
So where am I gonna sleep? On the floor.
Nice comfort huh? And she also hug Alfred (who is my teddy Bear).
Mama Chong came to school & woots, she brought us cake from coffee bean.
Thank goodness it's not a coffee cake. It's a blue-berry cake.
And sayang keep reminding me to collect 9.10 bucks from Ms Suganthi.
Owe money pay money. Hahas..
Teng2 is talking on the phone right now & I'm facebook-ing.
I don't know who she talking to and I don't wanna know.
Hehehs... & I ask Dylan to go die, cannot even pei me.
In the end, Tze Jun pei me reply my facebook comment. Haha.
Zikun is like at the front of the classroom, don't know do what.
Meanwhile the teachers keep patrol-ing.
The rest of the 16 kids? They are sleeping nicely on their sleeping bags.
Funny part is that no one in this classroom hear any alarm but people outside the classroom hear. Freaky huh? Hahs, oh well.
Thats all for now. I still got around 2 and half hour before waking them up.
Adios! :)

2010-03-15T23:30:00.002+08:00

Hey Hey Hey!
Today first day of camp, my first camp this year.
Not only that, it's helping PLTC for the sec3s.
Okay, I'm kinda irritated with blogger or this com or whatever it is.
This second time i'm typing this post.
The first was deleted by accident and I'm irritated.
Today was okay la. Abit boring, hilarious & sleepy.
My mummy even made coffee for me & I went home to take.
Now, here I am drinking coffee & thinking about today.
Everything was okay until bathing time.
Our lectures were cancelled due to shortage of time & I was happy about it.
Anyway, teng2 & me went to bathe in the 2nd floor toilet.
We put a bucket under the sensor to make sure the lights stays on.
However, while I was half-way bathing, the lights went out.
I was super afraid & getting hysterical as the moments pass by.
But thankful the lights came back on, all thanks to Teng2.
I so owe you.
And yes, I'm afraid of darkness & I don't know why.
I'm planning to overcome it soon but it seems that it's not soon enough.

Anyway, IMAN STOP CALLING ME OI!!
First Celup, then Minah, now Oi?
You sure love to give me names that doesnt suit me at all. >:(

2010-03-14T16:14:00.002+08:00

I'm well again & it's a miracle!! :)
Anyway, tomorrow will be the day & I'm sorry for the hurt I'm gonna cause you.
Tomorrow is also PLTC for the sec3s & I'm going to make observations.
I'm so gonna ton through the night.
First camp ever this year & I just can't wait for tomorrow to come.
Hahs, oh well, have to drink lots & lots of water.
And ps to Iman Nashoha! My name is not OI! >:(

Sick, Sick-ed, Sicko..

2010-03-13T14:05:00.003+08:00

Bahhh....
Yesterday I seem to be fine until I got home.
Well, my dad kinda show attitude to me, just cos I was late abit.
And I can't be bothered by him.
Then last night, fever, running nose and sore throst came to invade me.
So unlucky huh?
I have not been sick for a very very long time.
Thank goodness, I feel so much better today after taking a panadol flu.
My elder brother is also sick today.
Guess the flu is in the house already.

I'm gonna drink lots of water and have a healthy meal.
Pray hard I'll be okay on Monday! :)

ps I got my testimonials already but so disappointing! :(

Race against time!

2010-03-10T11:59:00.004+08:00

Sometimes it's best that you keep to yourself but other times, it's best when you share.
Guess now I get it when they say humans aren't perfect at all.
They talk, they gossip, they do whatever they think is right, not caring about other people's feelings. All they care about is themselves first, others next.
They make others feel unwanted, alone and other negative things.
This is the negative side of human beings.

It's been a long long long week for me.
Well, it's only Wednesday today and I wish today is Saturday so that I can sleep the whole day.
Last Friday, which is guides day, was kinda okay.
Yeah, commitment, commitment, commitment.
Sometimes I even wonder why the hell am I in this thing.
It's not that I've a commitment issue or what. It's just that I'm tired of it.
Anyway, enrolment package arrived on Sat.
And I've paid all that needs to be paid already plus the online confirmation,
I've already finish that.
So now, left the document to be posted which I'm gonna post on Friday.
And also the CPF thing which my bro gonna do it for me this weekend.
And also the lappy which I'm gonna buy tomorrow.
So after this week, everything will be settled. I just can't wait.
Then, next week, just need to check the stuff.

Next week also gonna have to help out at the PLTC camp.
And I don't even know the damn schedule, how to help out?
Gah, Daddy's gonna go fishing on next Wed.
Bros all wanna go, left me alone at home while Mummy's working.
Dad ask me along but fishing? Nah, no thanks.
It's the same as golf, watching the grass grow.
But for fishing, it's watching the fish swim.
No offense to those who love fishing. It's just that I dislike fishing.
Re-reading my post, I sound like as if I whining fustratedly.
Oh well, I am fustrated & I miss my friends who are in school now.
I miss talking to Arvind and Sham and Brandon and Shimin and Weien.
3 of them got school and 2 of them MIA. Hahs, more like I MIA la.
Oh well, Poly gonna start real real soon. But perhaps we'll have a gathering before that.
Induction on 12 & 13 april. Thank goodness my course no orientation.
If have, I think I'll die before I go.

Enough talk about poly stuff.
Hmm... last Thursday, Ben called me. It's been a long long time since we last talk.
Like 5 months he go MIA. Hahs, miss those times where Me and Sham used to 'bully' him.
Usually it's Sham who bullied him whenever he give me lollipop & never give Sham.
Hahs, miss those good old fun times. Wonder how he is now... tsk.
And speaking about friends, Dylan is getting on my nerve.
Oh wait, he's always on my nerve. Either annoying me or insulting me.
Gah, so irritating. Now he's a peadophile. Oh wait, he's forever that.
Anyway, I create a song for him:

"A giant Dylan with a belly piercing.
Falls in love with a little girl.
And every night on a bright moonlight,
Over the bridge he came.

He hugged & kissed, his cutey little miss
Under the black night sky
And every night on a bright moonlight
It sounded like this to them...
Aroom censure, Aroom censure, Aroom doola doolay..."

Nice right? Hahhahs....
The song is the same tune to 'A cannibal king'.
Uber cool ah, wait 'til I sing it in his face.
I hope my daughter who is ahem ahem to Dylan won't mind the song.
Oh well, thats all. Gonna nap for awhile.
'til then! :]

Alive & Kicking

2010-03-03T11:45:00.002+08:00

It's been a long long week & I just can't wait to flop down on my bed & sleep again.
I was suppose to go Tao Payoh today but Mommy says go tomorrow.
I don't even know why the heck am I doing, going to Toa Payoh.
Gah, whatever.
Renewal of promise & enrolment ceremony was kinda okay.
So yes, Im a YA now & the guider in charge of YA is Ms Hasna.
She rocks big time once you get to know her.
Well, on the surface, she looks damn damn fierce but actually she's not.
Meet friends from other school but mostly all are JCs students.
Gonna have UN camp in March & woots! This year, have NAT CAMP!!
But this time round, it's at NCC campsite. I so wanna go!!!
I went to NPCC campsite at Pulau Ubin for Nat camp when I was Sec 3.
& Nat camp is super fun & I dont mind going again & again.
I miss my Nat camp friends though. :(
& Ruiting didnt went for the YA induction. She was suppose to go with me!

Oh well, today & tomorrow, younger brother will not be at home.
He's off to camp & I'm so glad.
One bro down, one more to go & Ridduan is irritating nowadays,
I just felt like going somewhere else to live.
Especially when he start saying stuff about me, those unkind stuff.
& he's super black now, all thanks to the sun & his stupid dragonboat.
Gah, super annoying & irrtating.
Maybe someday, I'll just tied him up and taped his mouth to shut him.

Well, I don't feel like blogging anymore now.
So any more updates will be on the next post or so.
Besides, I'm kinda irritated with people who loves to spam other people's tagboard.
Like nothing better to do. Spam tagboard instead of confronting face to face.
Gee, just shit them all.
Whatever. Gonna be down in school this Friday.
'Til then.

I AM ME

2010-03-03T09:41:00.006+08:00

"In all the world, there is no one else exactly like me. There are persons who have some parts like me, but no one adds up exactly like me. Therefore, everything that comes out of me is authentically mine because I alone chose it.

I own everything about me: my body, including everything it does; my mind, including all its thoughts and ideas; my eyes, including the images of all they behold; my feelings, whatever they may be: anget, joy, frustration, love, disappointment, excitement; my mouth, and all the words that come out of it: polite, sweet or rough, correct or incorrect, my voice, loud or soft; and all my actions, whether they be to others or to myself.

I own my fantasies, my dreams, my hopes, my fears.

I own my triumphs and successes, all my failures and mistakes.

Because I own all of me, I can become intimately acquainted with me. By doing so, I can love me and be friendly with me in all my parts. I can then make it possible for me to work in my best interests.

I know there are aspects about myself that puzzle me, and other aspects that I do not know. But as lond as I am friendly and loving to myself, I can courageously and hopefully look for the solutions to the puzzles and for ways to find out more about me.

However I look and sound, whatever I say and do, and whatever I think and feel at a given moment in time is me. This is authentic and represents where I am at that given moment in time.

When I review later how I looked and sounded, what I said and did, and how I thought and felt, some parts may turn out to be unfitting. I can discard that which is unfitting, and keep that which proved fitting, and invent something new fot that which I discarded.

I can see, hear, feel, think, say and do. I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be productive, and to make sense and order out of the world of people and things outside me.

I own me, and therefore, I can engineer me.

I am me and I am OK!"

Author - Virginia Satir

Life is like a Highway.

2010-02-24T12:00:00.004+08:00

Truth: A key element in successful relationships is honesty.
Namely, being able to detect when your significant other isn't practising it.

Gah, my friends who are posted to SP have already gotten their enrolment package.
And this means that my enrolment package will come soon.
Which will mean that orientation will be coming soon.
Which will also leads to poly starting. SHIT!
Honestly, I want this hols to extend til forever. Yeah, kinda bullshitting here.
Last few days, many plans were cancelled.
So end up sitting at home, watch TV and read lots of books.
Last Friday, I did went back to school & kinda okay la.
I didn't realise teaching the Sec 1 footdrill is tougher than I myself march.
And knowing myself, I kinda get impatient when they didn't get it right.
Yupyup, I've limited patience. Definitely can't teach new-comers.
And she's a bitch. Hahs, Sabrin will know who I'm talking about. So will Hillary.
Anyway, I've just finish reading syg's blog & well, who won't be pissed?
For the past 9 years, the seniors brought pride & honour to the unit.
And all that change. Whatever ba. Can't be bothered at all.
Sides, gonna have a chat with the guiders about this YA thing.
TDC was as per normal but honestly, this year more boring.
Shocking thing is that it ends early & GOH wore diff uniform. Kinda cool.
After that, Teng2 and me went for late lunch and wait for Nurul, super long.
Waited like forever then she turn up & saw her old-old-old friend. Hahs.

Sunday, Monday, Tuesday went in a blurr.
Honestly, I can't remember what I do and who cares.
All I remember is that each time I went to bed or woke up, I'll be irritated.
With myself. Thats the only 2 time of the day that my thoughts run wild.
Like everything I wanna say or express is during those two moments.
And not only that, poems will start forming in my head. wth ah.
So irritating and I've totally stop writing poems already. Waste paper only.
Speaking of getting irritated, Dylan is so in deep shit.
Heard some stuff about him and everything.
He so owes me lots of explanations. & yesterday, i saw Deyao and 3 other guys walking.
Down at my carpark there. The way they walk is so hilarious.
I bet they gay first before going home. Hahhs.

This is to some people who are at war with each other(s).
Honestly, I don't know how to start this.
It's been such a long time since it last happen.
Remember during Sec 1 & 2, you guys always fight with each other.
Ended up with one of you crying and then, you guys be friends back again.
And it's happening again now. Only there's no one to interfere & settle things for you guys.
You guys are gonna be 16 this year and yet, matters that are so simple aren't solved yet.
When someone's at fault or her attitude sucks, tell it to her face.
Everyone deserve to know what's their mistakes and faults.
No one's perfect and keep in mind, all those things you guys have been through together.
Isn't it a waste to just throw everything away because of this?
A friendship of 3-4 years, just thrown into the wind. Is it worth it?
Even if you guys say that she won't change, it won't hurt to just let her know.
Whether she will change or not, it's really up to her.
All those times, the fun, joy, laughter, tears, everything, you went through.
Everyone deserve chances.
Just know that, you want to leave this school with her as you enemy or as your friend.
It's up to you guys to choose but whatever your decisions are, it's for life.
My advise to you guys, talk to her, let her know & give her a chance.
It won't hurt to try.

There, already say my piece but whether they wanna listen or not,
its up to them to decide.
Well, I can only be a friend to listen, to advise, to comment.
I can't be a friend who makes decision for them.
And to be fair, I shall listen to the other party also. Haiis..
From then, 'til now. When is it gonna stop?
And OMG, I saw someone who looks like Shufang at my cousin's facebook.
Hahs. Thats cool.
Anyway, this week gonna be X-country for my younger bro.
JY to him.
& speaking about brothers, a monster eating machine is at home.
And yeap, thats Ridduan. He's having hols now 'til in April.
Then his school re-open together with mine.
So in the meantime, I'll have to suffer his presence but thank goodness,
He's having his dragonboat training almost everyday.
Peace. And from yesterday, I come to realise that can't ever put my mum and Ridduan together. War will break out and the noise can be hear within 20miles around.
Oh God, my com almost hang on me but didn't.
If not, all my downloads will be gone.
Damn com, I can't wait to get myself a lappy. Considering a MacBook.
Gah, thats all for now.
Firstly, I'm patiently waiting for poly to start & not looking forward to it.
Next, I'm hoping everything will solve by the time I go down to school.
Next, I want to talk to the guiders about this YA.
Lastly, I miss Hilfi, lots. :(

BACK FROM EVERYTHING

2010-02-17T14:36:00.003+08:00

Love wasn't the fairy tale I once thought it was.
Love was real & wonderful, & I gloried in it.
Love was the heart of happiness & I had found my happiness in my loved ones.

Looking at my last 2 posts, it was short and not much things are being said.
So this post will sure be a long one. :)
Finally, after several hours of looking through blogskins, I've found a nice one.
And after listening to so many songs, I've decided on these four songs.
Not really my favourites but it describe my mood right now. :)
At first, I was pissed with my com cos it keep hang-ing on me.
But thank goodness, I restart it and everything is okay.

Back to the last few days which is CNY.
Well, things were okay, just that we arrived kinda late at Ahma's house.
My aunts, uncles & cousins were all already there & it's kinda a surprise.
Past few years, it's always my fam who are the first arrival but not this time.
I was quite surprise to see a particular aunt of mine, since last year there's some trouble.
The food were nice and well, we watch this chinese show that is so hilarious.
Hmm, my cousin who is the same age as me already start school.
She's in AJC and hell yeah, most of my chinese cousins are super-smart.
Another cousin of mine is in MI, 2nd year while another cousin is married.
Such a joyous & enjoyable event. :)

On Monday, it's BBQ day.
Basically, we made a BBQ pit instead of going to East Coast or where-ever.
Since none of us want to go so far.
The day before Sunday, Mummy & me already marinated the chicken wings.
And the guys were supposed to start the fire.
So everything's prepared except my brothers didnt know how to start the fire.
I was like," Eh, you NCC, noob ah? Never start fire using fire starter and charcoal before?"
& he say," NCC always used solid fuel, so don't know ah.& I'm not noob kay."
And the only person who knew is my dad who is still alseep.
I ended up starting the fire & it survive until my bro took over & it died.
So the fustrating la but luckily after I get the fire going for the second time,
Daddy woke up & so he took over. :)
Everything that could be found was all barbequed.
So dinner was like a feast with prawns, fish, chickens & buttered-corn.
Delicious! :) It's a success!

Yesterday was a hell day for me.
Everyone in the house woke up super late exp for Dad.
And gee, my brothers are super irritating & annoying with their loud voices.
Keep singing and not to mention, their singings are atrocious.
Then Ridduan wants to make a deal with me.
More like a bet and I have to pay him like 100 bucks if I lose the bet.
I gave him that are-you-insane-you're-barking look.
And he say nevermind. Hahs. Like I will give up 100 bucks for a stupid bet.
Anyway, the other day I saw Hong Siang & his parent, I guess.
Didnt know he moved into the block opposite from mine.
Oh well, I've been reading as much as possible before poly starts.
I love to read books, to get the story line and sometimes learn phrases in other languages.
And gah, my choice of books is totally not scientific books.
Well, Daddy brought home his science books regarding all the water tech stuff.
He says to let me read first so that I'll get an idea of things that will be taught.
I gave him my are-you-kidding look but unfortunately, he doens't get it.
Not to disappoint him, I'm gonna make an effort to read the two thick books.
Perhaps next week after a trip to the library. :)

Hmm.. I guess thats all for this post.
Well, I so need to get off com so that I can have a quick lunch & off to meet Cindy.
Goshness, time flies really fast and now is like middle Feb.
Soon it will be Mar, then April & shit, poly starts.
Oh ya, almost forgot, this Sat, thinking day celebration.
Should I go? I must admit I'm totally disappointed in the bloody award.
It's such a freaking disgrace to the older generations.
Haiiss, not my bloody business & so, i'm not gonna care.
Right now, I need to enjoy my freedom as much as possible and not be tied down by poly.
Gah, I wanna join rock-climbing as my CCA.
Or maybe not as CCA but as my leisure sport. Anyone wanna join me??

Gosh Hilfi, it's been a long, long, long time since I last saw you,
& it feels like forever.
I MISS YOU alot. :(

2010-02-11T15:16:00.002+08:00

Swirl and keep swirling it does..
Nothing to keep me from feeling that..
I love Mr Brightside!
:)
Hahs. Just got back from my Grandpa's place.
And I'm kinda exhausted.
Well, last few days, I was sick, keep having those stupid headaches.
And I don't even know why.
Back to Grandpa's place, met my newly-born cousin.
Played with my cousin also and gee, he's full of energy.
But once his battery dies, he's back to sleeping.
Oh, today is also my Aunt's birthday & Mommy is talking to her now.
Gosh, each time I wanna blog, I ended up being not in the mood.
Maybe I should just shut down this blog.
Shall stop now, the mood has gone.
Just can't wait for school to start but also longing for more holidays.
Complicated.

2010-02-05T12:07:00.002+08:00

Boo-Ya! :)
Gee, I'm trying to keep my eyes open but just can't.
Guess I'm just gonna take a nap later before meeting YT at school.
All thanks to waking up early, as early as the bird.
Like finally, I've finish baking cookies and tarts for my chinese fam.
Next week, my mum gonna just bake some oat cookies.
Ah, I miss my bed. :(

Anyway, on 2nd feb, everything went okay.
Just that Mummy keeo demanding coke and she's not suppose to drink cold drinks.
Haiis, but she's stubborn. This morning she just bought 2 bottles.
And I was thinking of drinking everything up.
hehehs...

Aaarrgghh, another time update.
I'm going to bed right now.
*Yawn*

2010-02-01T09:22:00.005+08:00

I've gotten everything I've wanted but still I can't seem to shake that heavy feeling in my heart.
All thanks to my brother who told me some stuff that I dont want to know.
I shall forget about it.... if I could.

Today of all days, Mummy is working!
She's suppose to be resting today, since her birthday is tomorrow.
& I'm gonna bring her out in the morning. Haiiss...
Mummy so stubborn when it comes to working.
So here I am alone at home, doing what I'm suppose to do.
Last week was kinda fun.
Thursday and Friday, Mummy and I went out.
Well, these days, my daily companion is Mummy & she justs understands me.
(on certain issue and not everything.)
Sham & Arvind already start school and I'm gonna miss them lots.
And also, I miss talking to Brandon. :(
Oh well, maybe we'll meet up around April to talk or what-so-ever.
Right now, CNY are coming! WooHoo....
Can meet my cousins and aunts and grandma and uncles!!
Looking forward to all the nice nice food too! Hahhs..

Besides that, I found out some of my friends whom I know through camps are posted to NP!
Hahs.. So happy, definitely can meet them.
Gee, I just can't wait for Poly to start.
And in the meantime, I'm freezing my butts off at home (not literally).
This week, I'm going down to school to check out GG.
The thing that makes me angry the MOST is that..
Some people just don't know how to appreciate help that is given.
I just dislike those kind of people.
Keep insisting they are the good ones, better than us.
WTF? Like hello? What did they achieve?
Just don't want to admit defeat and say you're wrong and I'm right.
She's just afraid I say this, "I told you so..."
Since whatever that I say last year to her is coming true this year.
Whatever, & honestly, I'm not gonna care much about her.
So quit telling me what to do/help.
I come to do whatever I want since words that comes out of her mouth are all...
WORTHLESS!
There, finally, it's all out.
This is not directed to anyone, only to that one person who keep demoralising others.
That one person whom I thought I can rely on but sadly, not.

Anyway, referring to the last post.
Well, that guy.. hmm.. I think everyone in NVSS should know him.
Gee, duh.. he's a student there. Just because he have all the people in the world,
doesnt mean that he can act so BIIGGG and MIGHTY.
He's just one piece of stick and talk about showing respect to others,
He have NONE. No offense but his attitude and arrogant face just piss me off.
One day, if he show me that arrogant face of his, God knows what I might do to him.
Goshness, I seem to be angry nowadays.
I just need to chill out...

Below are some belated pictures of my family in the kampung.
Well, Mummy and Daddy attend my aunt's wedding in Malaysia.

Guess thats all.
Tomorrow, am out.
Wednesday and Thursday, Gonna bake more cookies and tarts.
To give to my Chinese family. & speaking of which,
I wonder if I'll be able to meet my adorable cousin this year.
Haiiss, it sure looks like it gonna be a long long day.
By the by,
HAPPY ADVANCED BIRTHDAY, MUMMY!
I love you, always and forever!

2010-01-28T16:09:00.002+08:00

Tell me 10 reasons to why I should not be angry?
Tell me 10 reasons to why I should not be upset?
Tell me 10 reasons to why I should not be happy?
How about this?
Give me 10 freaking reason to why I should not hit that guy that I dont like?

2010-01-27T12:07:00.002+08:00

Firstly, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO HILFI & ALSO WEI EN.
To Hilfi, may all your dreams/hopes/wishes come true.
Study hard as well & I love you lots. :)
To Wei En, OLD WOMAN!!!
Stay happy always & i miss hanging out with you! :)

Next, I've gotteninto my 1st cjoice course at NP! *smiles*
Im so happy and if i dont let it out soon, I think im gonna burst.
Hahhahs... I didnt expect to get that course but i did!! Hahhs..
But Im grateful to God for everything that has happen in my life. :)
It's gonna be a whole new experience; new environment, friends, stuff.
It might be a pain in the arse since everything is new, but it's worth it.
Majority are going to NYP. New port for NVSS students. ~Gah.

Things are kinda great these days.
I'm going out tomorrow, Friday and next week.
Next week also, I'm gonna start baking cookies for my aunt and grandma.
CNY are coming and i get to see them!! :)
Coming Tuesday is Mummy's birthday & I'm bringing her out.
Well, she deserve an off-day once in awhile.
Sides, I need to spend some quality time with Mummy.
And oh crap, I need to cancel my plan on Friday.
And mummy's not happy with me now.
Oh well, I'll talk to her later.
Right now, i feel so tired.
I've been so nervous yesterday that I didnt sleep well.
I was waiting for that sms and in the morning, i thght the sms came already.
But turn out, it's my aunt who ask me where i went to. -.-
wth? Well, I guess i'll get back to bed before i go out later.
'Til then. :)

2010-01-22T11:45:00.002+08:00

Frank is super cute! (Celestine will know who I mean!)
I've got only afew minutes to update on my oh-so-not-exciting-life.
Hahs, Monday, I went back school & well, got the form.
And Dylan is being an ass. Like totally.
Then, Nonis send us home & my house is freaking near.
Tuesday, nothing much.
But I did went out to my aunt's house.
Most of my holidays, I spend it in my aunt's house.
Well, there is more fun than my house which is empty.
No one's home except me & my mum.
And it's BORING!!
Wednesday, went to teach Cindy.
And yesterday, Im stuck at home, doing nothing.
Hahs, honestly, I so need my sleep.
Haven been sleeping well these days.
Gotta chow now, more updates later next week.

Oh ya,
HAPPY BIRTHDAY NOVELL!! :)

2010-01-18T09:54:00.003+08:00

two is better than one
I hate separation.
It just sucks big time.
& I can only see him once in awhile
Each time only makes me miss him even more. :(

Heyheyhey.. :)
Today, Mummy is working again & so here I am, after doing all my chores.
& I'm going out in 1 hours time.
The pain is finally gone & so are my moodswings.
Before I get too wraped up in myself, let's go back to what I did on Friday.
Friday, I went back to school to see how things are going.
& everything seems fine, just that its last minute.
The performance is great & the souvenirs are ultra-cute!
Hehehes.. Then on Saturday is CCA open house.
Well, the only part that sucks is that one motherfucker dont allow people to go in.
It stands at the gate there like some guard dog & barks.
Damn screwed up please.
& the best part is I had my fair share of laughter with Hillary.
She started evrything first & when she starts laughing, she cant seem to stop.
Weird huh? And laughter is contagious.
& this Dylan Nah keep preying on the twins like some phaedophile.
Hahhahs. After open house, went to talk to my friends about some stuff.
Then went home, aunt came to my house & then went out with fam.
Damn tiring ah & went to sleep at about 2am.
Yesterday, woke up to Mummy scolding elder brother.
So I went to bathe and do whatever I intend to do & after that,
went back to sleep. Daddy came home & bloody woke me up.
& I got super pissed off with him & my brothers.
Plus the fact that someone scratch me & I didnt realise it til I was bathing.
Today, no one's home & I finally have some peace.
Also, I'm going for the YA course.

There lots of things that I know about & it just sucks.
Haiis.. & I'm so sick of trying to save our friendship.
So I'm not gonna try. I'm done trying, eversince last year.
Whatever happens, I don't give a damn anymore.
And another thing, this is directed to someone else.
Stop pretending to be someone you are not.
It'll only make people dislike you even more.
And last I check, only actors or actresses pretend.

2010-01-14T12:03:00.002+08:00

Honestly, I dont know what to post & I don't feel like posting.
All thanks to the damn stupid pain Im feeling now.
All I wanna do is lie down in my comfy bed & go to sleep.
So what am I doing on com?
Oh ya, waiting for my Mp5 to be fully charge. So bloody shit.
Anyway, my Olvl results are kinda okay la.
My Bio & CH is such a shock to me, I just can't believe my eyes.
Oh well, atleast I pass & can go all the 4 institues.
But I'm definitely going poly. And not JC.
Congrats to my 3 cousins too. They pass with flying colours.
And speaking of my cousins, I'm gonna meet one of them soon.
Chinese New Year is coming & I just can't wait.
Then in March, one of my closest cousin is getting married.
Kay, Im so lazy to post anymore.
Gonna sleep the pain off now.

2010-01-11T09:43:00.002+08:00

Honestly, I'm not supose to use the com so early in the morning..
But I need to do something so that I'll remain sane.
Yeap, TODAY IS THE DAY!
Last night, I couldnt sleep at all & I had dreams, more like nightmares.
This morning, I woke up so early but thank goodness, i manage to get back to sleep.
Mummy's not in now, she's working at my primary school canteen.
& here I am, blogging between doing my chores & eating breakfast.
How I wish today can be postpone to like next 2months or so.
Right now, i'm feeling fear, nervousness & anticipation.
What if i fail? I know i'll get 1 F9, all thanks to Amaths.
Aarrrrgghhh... I dont know what to expect.
From the day my Os ended, I've been praying hard for my results.
I just don't want to be the one crying tears of sadness.
But nothing can be done now, all is over.
I just have to wait for results patiently.

Later, I'm going off for lunch with friends.
I bet they feel nervous & scared too.
May God give me strength & courage to face the day.
& whatever my results is, I must thank God for it.
All the best!

2010-01-07T08:59:00.002+08:00

I know this isnt what i wanted,
Never thought it'd come this far,
Just thinking back to where we started
& how we lost all that we are
We were young & times were easy,
But i could see it's not the same.
I'm standing here but you don't see me,
I'd give it all for that to change.

Honestly? 3 more days to result day.
It sucks, everything sucks big time.
Kay, basically, I'm freaking out alot & scared.
& I don't know what to expect or hope for.
ITE is still in my mind but i don't want to go there.
& yeah, I want things to be plain & simple.
I like to have my life in control.
Shit, shit, shit, shit, fuck, fuck,fuck, fucking shit la.

Monday, was out almost the whole day but i was home for lunch.
Daddy was home that day, thats why.
Then that night, he send me to my Aunt's house for sleepover.
Tuesday morning, I send my beloved niece to school.
In the noon, i fetch her home and my cousins came.
We went out to Clarke Quay & ate dinner there.
Well, we didnt went back to our Aunt's house 'til late in the morning.
Super-fun & honestly, I've no regrets that i didnt go for my class gathering.
And i went back home on Wed morning.
Went out breakfast at compang with Mum & guess who i saw?
Gah, that instructor from gg camp.
I also saw Mat in the bus & ZR buying his lunch.
Hahs, ZR looks the same as ever, maybe abit fatter eh? Hahs, kidding. :)

I guess tomorrow I'll go check out some open house poly.
Honestly, I didnt want to go but my bro insist i go.
So i think I'll go to NP & RP just to humour my bro.
Well, my mum wants me to go RP cos it's close to home.
But I told her if she force me to go RP, just like she force me go NVSS,
I'll not attend the school days & I totally don't give a damn if i got kick out.
I wanna atleast choose something that i really want, not cause it's near or not.
Sometimes, I just don't get my parents at all.
All these years, they still think the same.
Haiis, forget it. I just can't wait to be 21 years old.
Out of my parent's care & I can't wait to go backpacking around the world.
After Poly, I'll find work, then when Ridduan is out of NS,
I'll ask him if he wanna go backpacking with me & knowing him,
I know he would. Plans for the future. Hahs, I just can't wait.

Right now, I'll just have to pray hard that I'll pass my Olvl.
And pray that I'll get good results.
But whatever the outcome is, I'll thank God for it. :)

2010-01-04T08:55:00.002+08:00

I'm freaking irritated now.
Well, I never woke up as early as today & all thanks to my parents.
They make so much noise in the morning at 7am.
Grr... And my dad is home again, not feeling well.
And right now, I'm alone at home, 'cos mum is gone with dad to clinic.
Ridduan & younger bro already start school while elder bro is back in camp.
Thank goodness I'm going out later, if not, i'll be a victim again.
Yesterday was a shitty day for me.
All the household chores is all push to me.
And my bros are bloody arseholes.
Meanwhile, my parents went to Malaysia to attend a wedding.
Well, one of my grandaunt's daughter wedding.
Some of my cousins went and the way my mum told me about it,
it's so hilarious what happen there.
My uncle ask me & bros to go but nah, once is enough.
The first time we went there, the experience is such a bad one
that i told my mum i'll never go again, ever.

Anyway, tomorrow is the class gathering & I'm not even sure if i should go.
It'll have to depend on whether my dad is home or not.
& whether mum still wants me to go to my aunt's house.
Ah, whatever, & honestly, the gathering is abit useless since so little ppl go.
Haiis... right now, i'll go back to sleep.

By the by, Happy Schooling!

2010-01-03T10:36:00.000+08:00

Guess what?
I'm the maid for today.
Bleah, shit my brothers!!

2010-01-02T14:43:00.003+08:00

Another ending & a new beginning to a brand new year.
Let bygones be bygones...
But do refelct on mistakes & perhaps learn from them.
Live life to the fullest & believe that life is always fair.
And hence, Happy New Year everyone! :]

Another new beginning...Hahs.
This definitely brings to mind the word resolutions.
Well, my resolutions this year is kinda plain & simple.
To achieve good results, continue studying hard, have more clothes & fun
and lastly, for everyone to be as happy as i am (essp my love ones).
I hope for nothing more & i'm totally grateful for what i have now.
And i have to thank God for this.
Last Monday & Tuesday, went back to school.
More like accompany this little girl name Celestine & Huiming.
Honestly, the school is becoming uglier and uglier.
By the by, points have not been counted yet.
Wednesday was fun time at Niv's house! :) Hahs.
We drink, eat, talk & had fun. Basically, we chill alot.
& gah, yesterday super tired, went out whole day & came back late.
coming Monday, things will get busier in the noon.
But atleast i'm doing a good deed. hahs.
Nothing much to update.
I'm so gonna miss The Mentalist show alot. :[
& Celestine! There's new pics in your phone!
Post it, will ya! :] Thanks, hehes..

And lastly, I'm grateful to God for having friends that are always there for me.
Friends that comfort me and had fun with me.
All those ups & downs they went through with me.
I couldn't ask for more and i know, our friendship will last.
I love all my friends! :)

2009-12-25T15:08:00.002+08:00

Gah, I found my bed.
Hahs, I'm super bored now.
Well, i was watching a movie just now when my elder brother ask me to cook the spaghetti.
wth ah. Buat spoil aje. By the by, my elder brother also rocks big time.
Hahahas. Thanks so much for the mp5 that you gave me, bro. :)
And gah, my younger brother was jealous but who cares.
Haven been going out for quite some time.
So i've got really nothing to post about.
Just that i really need to get out soon, if not, i'll go crazy.
From last week 'til today, i stayed at home & help mum with her chores.
I cook, wash clothes & tidy my room which is no use cos in the end,
everything became untidy again.
Another reason i can't go out is that my dad is at home.
He was on leave 'til like last monday.
Then, yesterday half day & today at home again.
It's torture whenever he's at home. Im a victim.
He'll disturb me 'til I really feel like screaming at him.
But since he's my dad, i'll just let it go.
Thank goodness, elder bro came to my rescue again.
He's bringing us out to watch movie tomorrow but i dont want to watch movie.
Me & mum have other plans though.
Monday, am going out to meet celestine & after that, was thinking of going somewhere.
Wednesday, lunch with Dylan and yeah, was thinking of going Niv's house.
She's back in Singapore!!! woots! hehehs..
On 5th jan, still have the gat for 4E1. Gah..

Honestly, i just can't wait for results to be out.
After the Nlevel results were out, i become more restless.
I can't even have a nice sleep without having a nightmare.
Gah, a freaking nightmare!
This is shit crap sia and damn shitty.
And i'm really beginning to think that ITE is like the easiest choice.
Like so easy, gurantee can go in one.
Poly & JC like so tough.
Kay, i admit i want the easiest option in life.
I mean, who doesnt? Haiiss...
But i bet my dad will be super angry if i say i wanna go ITE.
Haiiss.. So complicated...

Gah, whatever la.
Merry Christmas everyone! :)
Next week is already new year, must have azam terbaru. :)

2009-12-20T15:58:00.002+08:00

Heyhey..
Just thought that i'll post again.
Well, this time is about what i found out and my feelings.
Basically, I'm happy for Dylan as he gets into Sec 5!
Congrats, congrats!! :) And also lunch on wednesday! :)
Next is that Jan is fast approaching and I'm beginning to freak out.
Like totally. All 'cos results are gonna release soon.
And i got no freaking idea what course i wanna go to.
I got afew courses im interested in.
Guess I have to start from there and sides, i dont want to go to Uni.
I told my mum about this and no doubt, she's kind of crush.
She told me to try to go to Uni and dont just stop at diploma.
The thing is i wanna go to Uni but I dont like to study alot.
Like who likes, right?
And from looking at my friends who are in Uni now, they are stressed out.
I don't want to live under pressure again. I just don't want.
Gone Olvl with my determination to study.
It's out of me.
Results, results, results...
Maybe when the day comes, i'll think about it, yeah?
Oh, by the by, anyone wants to go Republic poly open house in Jan?
Well, my brother ask me to go and im not gonna go alone.
I was thinking of just going to all the poly open house since i got nothing better to do.
Anyone wants to go, please contact me! :)

Everything that has happen, i miss Hilfi.
He's in Malaysia now and will be back soon.
School gonna start in 2 weeks time for him.
I hope he'll be more serious in his studies.
I love him too much not to care.

2009-12-20T14:02:00.020+08:00

Boo!
Kay, firstly, younger brother was okay and they came home at 2am around there.
Thank Goodness, its not that serious and no need admitted.
But i have to thank GOD for this. :)
Next is that KL trip with fam is super fun! :)
First day, nothing much, just take a look around the hotel where we were staying.
And gah! I share room with my two brothers.
They are super irritating and annoying. And worst part!!!
THEY SNORE!!! like omg pls, i plug into my mp3 and turn vol to max to fall asleep.
Next day, went shopping!!! Muahahaha..
We went to masjid india, chinatown and time square.
And at time square, the guys went to play arcade while mummy, daddy and me ate ice-cream.
Super fun plus the ice-cream super huge and nice also. :)
Third day, went up to Genting and 2 hours drive up there, i fall asleep.
On my mummy's shoulder and super cold also... brrr...
We took the cable car up and gee, my younger bro was super scared pls.
He keep hugging me and wont let go of the cable car pole..
Wth ah, super hilarious..
When we reach the top, Ridduan and Rahiman went to play outdoor theme park.
I wanted to go play also but i was scared..
Honestly speaking, i'm afraid of heights alot.
& it's been a long time since i had high elements activities.
So instead, Mummy, Daddy, younger bro & me went shopping again & eat more ice-cream! :)
Woots! The ice-cream soooo nicee!! Hehehes..
Four day, return to Singapore and ate dinner at woodlands.
Almost puke my dinner out all thanks to gastric pains. :(
Anyway, let the pictures do the talking now.
As a saying goes, picture speaks a thousand works! :)

I was tired & irritated by something.

Sian, i was watching TV!

In my parent's room. :)

Daddy in casino. Hahs.

He didn't gamble though.

I meet Mr snowman. Hahahas..

And Santa too! :)

And this look so nice..

Like a castle.

Like in Disneyland.

My beloved parents..

At the bus terminal..

In the cable car..

I love this picture!

So nice and in the genting hotel. :)

And meet my retarded brother name Ridduan!!

And he's eating subway! Hahs..

And look at him, open his mouth so big!

And i took the picture of this cute children..

They are willing to let me take their pics.

So nice ah..

Hahs, honestly?

It's just a photograph on one of the walls at time square.

hahhas..

And snowman!!!

Christman tree! :)

This pic is with my mum and

honestly, i dont know where this is taken!

And this is with my dad!

And this is my three beloved brothers in my room! :)

2009-12-16T20:45:00.002+08:00

Heyyo..
Just a brief update as im not in the mood to fully update now.
Well, my younger brother is sick and im freaking worried about him.
Just got back from KL and he fall sick.
Plus the fact that now, my dad is driving him to the hospital.
I just hope & pray that nothing happens to him.
And i realise that during the KL trip, I've neglected my family quite often.
Well, we are like on a 'you mind your own business and i mind my own' basis.
Now, i tend to appreciate & treasure them more for who they are.
And for being there for me always.
Even though they are irritating at times and interfere too much in my life,
I know that they love me and i love them too. :]

2009-12-11T17:20:00.001+08:00

It's been one month.
I love you more than ever,Hilfi.
And i miss you lots.

2009-12-11T14:57:00.010+08:00

Hey..
Im super lazy to blog but i'll blog something.
The week has been tiring & i've been going out non-stop.
Yesterday is shit day please, i actually watch the sesame street at Np.
So the...
Wednesday, elder brother has his POP, below some picture of him & friends.
And i did household chores for 3 full days before i went out.
Damn freaking tiring & tomorrow im off to KL.
Need to wake up super early 'cos daddy don't want to drive us there.
So have to take bus instead, wth ah.
urgghh, watever. & im still worried about my montly best friend.
Thats all,i guess.
No mood to type any more.
Ciaoz!

2009-12-04T16:18:00.003+08:00

OMG!!!!
Alec and Jacob is so much cuter than Edward.
And definitely more handsome.
Especially Alec. omg omg...
And Jane is pretty, prettier than Bella..
Plus the actors who play werewolfes are build-up pls..
And the volturi are super-cool..
So the...
Gonna watch New moon soon. :)

2009-12-04T15:00:00.003+08:00

Moments of disappointment.

Finally, im back home from camp & i totally miss my bed & pillow.
Camp has been super tiring but kinda fun also.
First day, its mainly tent pitching, gadget making & night walk.
Well, they exceed timing alot, all thanks to the instructors lor.
& gee, attendance for camp is only 34 lor. So little.
Yt & me did the beds & unpack all the stuff.
Best part is that we got water heater in the toilet. like WTH ah.
So good & it's nice to disturb Hillary. Her reactions super funny ah.
Second day, kayaking was kinda boring. No challenge or competition.
And can't capsize ah. So not fun but Yt and me did jump into the sea.
Then both of us swim back to shore with our kayak & i got abit darker only sia.
Then four of us sun-tan in the sun to dry our clothes b4 going up to the bunk.
During lunch, the instructor say anyone who sleep at the 1st bed near the door will get lucky.
And I was sleeping on that bed!!! Wth ah..
After lunch, four of us try to get to sleep but too hot & YT keep touching KY.
In the end, we didnt sleep and went down instead.
Third day was super tiring.
Cook lunch & while waiting for lunch time, Ms suganti tortured me alot.
Then Chris Brown topic came out & all of us have a good laugh lor.
After lunch, we did ODC & seniors had a pit by ourselves.
Cook lots of food; chicken, fish, corn, potatoes & veggies.
Super nice & after that is campfire. It's not that fun & most irritating part is
that the girls start a story but ended by creating a NC-16 story of me & Hilfi.
Then we did the manito thing.
After that, all of us wash up & then the girls watch movies.
Five of us gave out ice-cream to the girls & we sat at the staircase & talk about everything.
Last day which is yesterday, 5 of us woke up super-late& guiders keep coming up to wake us up lor.
Ate breakfast, clean bunks then wait for the rest of the girls.
Ms Suganti send us to np and us with lunch. Stacy & Nurul also join us & we had alot of fun.
Poor waiter, everyone ignore him when he ask if we want our ice-cream now. Hahs.

I went home, bath, unpack & zonk out totally. Until 6.30 like that then woke up.
Watch TV, legend of the seeker which is okay la.
Then after that zonk out again until this morning.
Sunlight woke me up & i still feel super tired.
& i'm totally worried cos my monthly bestfriend not here yet.
And i also miss my eldest brother. 5 more days to his POP. Can't wait.
Totally. & not to mention, im going Malaysia next sat til i dont know when.
Hilfi is going next week also. & ya, i definitely miss Hilfi alot.
:( and he's watching new moon tomorrow!! So not fair.
Guess thats all.
I lazy type anymore. Pics will be up once its being upload.
Ciaoz! :)

ps. I update cos celestine ask me to. & i miss her too.

2009-12-04T13:20:00.002+08:00

Should i update my blog? Should I not?
Gee, I'm super lazy sia.... Later then..

2009-12-03T21:33:00.003+08:00

Hey.! Helping Fitri to update her blog cause i'm free and bored now..
Camp just ended today.!
And she helped my patrol loads.. xD.. Haha.. Well, Day 1, she helped me to make the laguage rack, and gave instructions to the sec1s if im not wrong.. Than Day 2, didn't really do much with her i guess.? She went kayaking, but i didn't.. And on Day 3, outdoor cooking, she sit with my patrol hear me complain.. xD.. Than had campfire after that, and ice cream during the movie.. And today, she helped and teach my patrol how to strike tent.. =.=.. So fun with her around.. And plus she made thing so much simpler for me.. xD..
So, lastly, she went back in Miss Suganthi's car with the rest of the seniors while the rest of us took the bus.. And now, I'm missing her loads.. And just can't wait to see her again.. ;D

- Celestine ;D

2009-11-29T15:01:00.032+08:00

If you see imperfection in yourself, then try to see it in others as well.
& if you forgive yourself for your imperfection, then try to forgive others for theirs.
To be a better person is to learn from your mistakes.
It's ironic that your actions & words are two different things.
Just so you know.

Boo!
Tomorrow starts camp! Hoo-yah! Hahs.
There will be kayaking & it's been a long long time since i last kayak.
& i think (if i remember correctly), they gonna go goat farm. & woots, can drink goat's milk! :)
Hahs. Everyday seem to be a busy day & the last thing i want is to feel disappointed & upset.
After all those times that i spoke up for him, now i realise that he's a jerk & not worth it.
(Canice should know who im talking about.) What a freaking disappointment to have a jerk as a friend. Gee, now i really see his true colours. *shake head*
I shall not dwell on it & just go on with my life.
Tuesday & Wednesday, mummy was sick, so i stay at home instead.
But i did went to the wet market & super-annoying please.
The uncles keep talking to me in Chinese & give me discounts for everything that I buy.
Well, the discount part is okay la but the chinese part gets on my nerve.
Wednesday, i went to cut my hair to shoulder length & Friday,
my aunts keep asking me why i cut my hair.
Gee, the last time i check, i dont need their permission to cut my hair right?
Oh well.. Besides the fun that i had during the week,
I also miss Hilfi alot. & I have to wait for next week to meet him.
And msn is super boring without Hilfi to talk to me.
How i wish he's here right by side now.
Yesterday, i lost my temper & I kinda show attitude to my family.
Even my dad is careful not to provoke me.
Usually, i seldom show attitude but when i do, it's kinda crap ah.
Urgghh.. whatever la.

Just looking forward to tomorrow & the days to come.

Time really flies super fast & the next thing i know, results will be out.

Hahs, results. I don't want to even think about it.

Thats all, i guess. Let the pictures do their job. :)

During farewell, it was okay la. Not that great but okay.

I got a blue-black on my leeg all thanks to the stupid bus & cycling was fun.

It's been a long time since i last cycle & i so miss my orange bike. :(

Just being me. :)

YT,me, KY, Agatha & Dayana. :)

Agnes & YT! :)

Me, KY & Stacy.

Hahs, thats my finger trying to block them. :)

Agatha, Agnes, Yuting, me & Kah Yarn. :)

Monday, went to Marina Barrage with Shimin, Weien, Canice & Shamala.

Thats where i found out about the bloody jerk! Grrr..

Bryan came later & it's suppose to be a girl's outings but i guess bryan change sex to female.

Hahs. We went to picnic there & splash around.

We also went to check out the exhibition gallery. Basically, we had fun.

From there, we went Orchard. & at Swensen, Shimin ah, keep shouting 'EXCUSE ME'.

All cos of the person, never serve us & sharing ice-cream with them is like sharing with monsters.

They attack ice-cream like never see ice-cream before. Super-funny ah.

After that, we went home. Fun but tiring.

And those two are busy choosing ice-cream

while weien is getting irritated.

Hahahs..

Shimin & me. :)

This is what happen to the poor ice-cream

after being attack by those monsters.

hehehes..

Canice attacking the ice-cream.

L-O-V-E!

Picnic by the ocean! :)

Shamala, me & chow.

Best friends. :)

Mirrors, can't even see anyone in the pic.

In the exhibition gallery.

Hahs, blue!! :)

This is taken at a staircase

& people can't go up cos we were blocking the stairs.

so the ...

Four chicks.

Peace out people. :)

The Five girls + 1 gay there. Hahs.

Canice, Shamala & me.

Sentosa with family was okay but not the same without Ridduan.

But overall, we had fun & we got lost in Sentosa also.

So the ....

And i saw Lewis & his reaction so hilarious.

Like never been to Sentosa before like that. Hahs.

Me & Younger brother.

Rahiman, Eldest brother.

He's botak cos he's in army now. Muahahha..

Mummy & me.

My retarded younger brother. :)

My eldest brother, me & younger brother.

It should be Pure.

For all the love today & tomorrow.

2009-11-20T14:43:00.003+08:00

Anticipation.
Just when you think you have it all under control, something happens.
Expectations are exceeded. Curiosity is piqued.
And then you're in that lovely holding pattern between
Do I Dare?...and Dare I Dont'?

Boo! Hahs. It's been a freaking tiring week & i'm exhausted!
Today is the only day i'm home and i'm feeling kinda sick.
Not those kind of cough, flu or fever sickness. Just the feeling of sick.
& not to mention, muscle cramp, all thanks to badminton.
And why can't it stop raining for once?
So the grr... Irritating!! Why can't the sun just be out for one whole week?
Mother......!

And somemore, in the morning, some retarded foreigner was in the bus with me.
Two of them actually & they started critising Singapore like nobody's business.
And the bus is full of Singaporeans & i hear every word they say.
If my mum didnt hold me back, i'm sure i already go up to the person
& kick his freaking butt to pluto! Like wtf?
He's in Singapore then critise the country. Dont like, go back to his corrupted country ah.
So the...

Monday dinner was great. Mummy cook steam fish for me & bros.
Well, i share the dish with bros & the way they eat gross me out.
And tuesday, i waste lots of money on clothes, shoes & food.
Spend like over 100 bucks & i can literally see my money decreasing greatly.
On Wednesday,met Hilfi & i saw lots of toddlers.
& they are ULTRA-CUTE pls! If can, i wanna bring them home.
let's just say i got a soft spot for toddlers, esp when their face look so innocent.
Hahs. Yesterday, went to Aunty's house & like usual.
& gee, i just realise next week is hari raya haji.
I'm looking forward to it, NOT.
Sunday, going Sentosa with family but Ridduan not going.
All thanks to his dragonboat ah, got some shit competition.
To put me off farther, Mummy says no swimming for these 2 months.
So it means i'll have to go swimming pool in order to swim.
Grrr.... I wanna go jurong swimming pool. There super-nice.
Next stp of mine is marina barrage. Went there once with family.
The scenary super nice & wind damn strong. & this time, am going with friends.
As for now, i'm gonna make sure i get rid of this sick feeling.
'Til then!
Ciaoz!
ps. thanks celestine for updating and that pic, i rmb! :)

It should be smooth.
For the new journey we embark on together.

2009-11-17T20:33:00.003+08:00

Hey.! Helping Fitri to update, so that her blog won't be that dead when she comes online.. ;D..
I'm still deciding which picture to upload.. I can't make up my mind..
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
ok, i've decided which picture..

Never edit Never crop..

Cause I wanna go and watch TV.. =.=

Well, hope i'll see her tomorrow.! ;D

That's all.!

Off to watch TV..

-Celestine ;D

2009-11-15T15:59:00.003+08:00

More than ever.
Hoo-yah!! Like finally, Os are so fucking over & best part of all,
NO STUDYING & WASTING BRAIN CELLS FOR ATLEAST 6 MONTHS!
Hahs. Bio students (exp for pure students) were screaming & shouting away.
After studying for 4 years & vomitting all out during O levels, now, like finally...
freedom! :) I'm overjoyed & super-happy. No more wearing uniform! :)
Thursday, after paper, Sham & I walk out of gate, breathe in deeply & said,
"Aaahhh... fresh air of freedom." & started cracking up.
Last two days, i tidy up my messy-looking room & throw atleast 200 papers.
& i still have one thick stack of papers, not done yet. Mainly, Emaths papers.
WTH huh. Not to mention my assessment books & I got atleast 6 files of notes.
Plus I didn't realise i waste tons of papers, doodling. So the grr..

Anyway, tomorrow starts a healthy lifestyle for me. hahs.
I'm gonna run every evening to prepare myself & next year, i'll take part in it.
No matter what. :) & every morning, i'll play badminton. No bball for me. :(
Next sunday, i'm going Sentosa with my family. Day out with family. -.-
YAY! Sun-tanning! :) :) :) Gonna swim too! :) :) :) hahs.
The last time I went Sentosa, we ended up at the hospital. All thanks to bro.
He got attack by Jelly-fish & he just won't calm down. So the...
& my younger brother is so super the irritating me to the max.
Let's just say he's bored at home & wants to tag along to wherever i'm going,
which I so don't want him to follow 'cos I'll have to look after him
& knowing him inside out, it's not gonna be nice for me.
So the grr... Oh well, whatever.
Right now, I can see my plans unfolding in front of me & i'm gonna make the best use of holidays to enjoy, chill out before getting my results in Jan.
& of course, more fun before JC/POLY/ITE (whichever) starts.
Everything gonna change in a matter of time & one thing to do...
is to keep moving forward (no turning back) :)
'Til next time.
Ciaoz! happy enjoying! :)

It should be Endless.
For the unbroken circle of our feelings for each other.

2009-11-12T12:17:00.002+08:00

Boo! I just finish my freaking lunch & now, i've got just afew minutes to blog before my retarded brother use it again to play games. What a freak huh?
Today, will be my last paper & i so can't wait for it to be over!
Yesterday, the sub-sc ppl with no Bio, scream in joy 'cos ytdy was theis last paper.
Wtf huh? Oh well, after today, i'll be super-free & no more studying for atleast 6 mths! :)
And i intend to spend most of my time at the beach, getting lots of sun. :)
But first, i so need to tidy my messy-looking room.
Anyway, to those ppl who still have papers tmr, JY! :)
And to those who are taking Os next yr, start studying!
You wont want to end up like me, fighting against time to complete revising.
And to those who will be in sec1,2 or 3 next yr, enjoy while you still can. :)
Guess thats all.
Better get off now before my idiotic brither scream his head off.
'til then.
For now, JY for my last paper! :)

p.s. IMY, Hilfi. & see ya soon. :)

2009-11-08T17:02:00.002+08:00

I wanna change my blogskin but it'll have to wait.
The thing is i lazy edit the damn skin & each time i edit, it became hay-wired.
So the grrrrr...
Irritating sia. Watever.
Left 2 more papers to go!
Which is on wed & thurs at 2.00pm. 1 hour paper cos its MCQ!
Common sense is all I'll say. :)
So JY! & all the best!

You make me smile, you make me laugh, you made my day. :)

You always keep me happy throughout.

I love you, Hilfi, more than ever. :)

2009-11-08T14:30:00.001+08:00

Life: Just when you think you have it all figured out, life presents you with a new plan.
It keeps things exciting & challenging. Especially if you're flexible enough to trust
in new things. & share that with someone you love.

Hoo-yah! Left 2 more papers & i'm off the hook! =]
Well, ss was okay, globalisation came out & almost everyone studied that theme.
The SBQ was about Iraq-Kuwait & I anyhow do. =X Geo was managable.
Chem was kinda okay la & woah, that cute teacher took my row's attendance.
Hahs, he's just nice to look at and he have a weird character.
Physica & Biology were kinda okay. Let's just say i don't put high hopes on my papers.
Wednesday night, was having dinner with my brother, Ridduan, & we were talking about Polytechnics. i want to go SP but also considering NP.
& bro say what matters the most is the course & i don't know which course I want.
I got so many interest but 1 thing for sure, Biomed is so out for me.
I had enough of Biology to last me for a lifetime. Biology is so TMI!
Haiis... Maybe i should think about all this when i get my results. Sounds great. :)

After this week, I'm free from studying. hahs. Am so happy! :)
Well, there'll be farewell on 25Nov. & i'm attending the camp which is on 30nov-03dec.
Woots, i'm bringing my own breakfast. Camp breakfast just sucks big time.
& last Friday, i walk into GG room & saw the stuff for farewell. Hahs. No surprises. :P
Besides that, i want to go to alot of places & there are lots of things i want to do.
But at the same time, I need to earn money. i can't believe i'll be broke soon.
& hols haven even start for me. I've been spending too much on food, need to cut down on that.
Anyway, I am giving tuition from Pri 1-4 & Sec 1-3. (preferably sec levels)
Subjects that i'll teach is Science & maths. (combined & E. for sec level.)
Anyone interested, email me at fitri_nike93@hotmail.com for more info.
Thanks. :)

The other day, I was walking home from school & i saw that guy.
The guy that i always see whenever i'm going to school in the morning.
He's in YTSS it hink & i didn't even know he existed, let alone stay in my blk.
Well, i never saw him before this year & he looks like a malay but actually is a chinese.
Last 2 days, wasn't feeling that well. All start on friday night, i was dwon with fever.
I just ate panadol & yesterday, just feeling more sleepy than usual.
So i slept super-early & today morning, i woke up feeling slightly vexed.
I realised that i accidentally scratch myself last night & i didnt know about it.
Like wtf. So the...
& this is gonna be super random. I hate that fatass thomas!
Like quite afew don't like her. Especially ern. Hahs.
The other time is she retained us in the hall for making too much noise & we had chem paper in the afternoon! Then before geo paper, she pull me out & ask me tuck in my shirt.
Damn F-up sia. The last time i check, I paid to take Os, not to tuck in my shirt.
& besides, i'm not a student in that school anymore. Graduated like 1 month ago.
So, i'm just a person taking Os in a school uniform, thats all.
& abiding school rules is super-high in my 'DON'T ' list.
I realise that the school is becoming more and more shit.
Maybe not the school, more like the teachers. (some, not all.)
I'm just super-glad i'm out of that stupid system.

Anyway, i fall in love with this shop at North Point which sell teddy bears!
I wanna check it out but restrained myself from doing so until Os. Hahs.
The last time i walked into Kiddy Palace to check out the teddy bears, my younger brother have alot of trouble dagging me out of the shop. Hahs. Can't help it.
Teddy bears are like super-cute & chow & sham says they'll buy me a real bear for my next birthday. Like i'll be overjoyed! But they are kidding, of course! Hahs.
Right now, i can't wait for Os to be over.
The last time i had fun feels like months back & i definitely can't wait to go tanning.
I'm looking more like Chinese, all thanks to being indoors.
After this week, i'll kiss Os goodbye. :)
Not to forget, yesterday was my dad's birthday.
Happy Belated Birthday, dad!
& tomorrow is younger brother birthday.
Happy Advanced Birthday, Zai! (& don't steal my number 09!) Hahs.

'Til after Os! :)

2009-10-31T20:29:00.002+08:00

Oh fuck..
Im alone at home while my family's out for dinner.
All thanks to the stupid cramp I have & somemore, its the 1st day today.
So the shit pls. In total pain right now & drinking warm water seem to worsen it.
So the grr...
Anyway, ask my dad about it & seems like i can't go for the trip.
Wtf wtf wtf...
Oh well, just accept it and move on. Am trying to do that.
Additional mathematics was kinda like normal.
After the exam, i was damn exhausted, like brain-drain.
That only happens to me when the paper is tough.
And next week is gonna be a tougher week than this week.
All is memory work and SS, i'm so in deep shit.
I haven been revising well & Bio, i haven even touch yet today.
So the grr.... & can't wait for exams to be over.
Am super in pain now.
Wait for the next post to get a full update.
Ciao!

2009-10-29T09:25:00.002+08:00

Just woke up once again and now, having breakfast (& i bathe already) in front of the com.
Like wth ah, both my parents went out again & there's this old aunty outside my house don't know do what. Keep looking here and there like she's looking for something & i'm getting freaked out by her actions. Like who wont?
Yesterday maths paper was great. But i didnt do one Q 'cos i don't know how to do but the rest is manageable. :)
Today, Amaths/P1. So the grrr... & yesterday I studied SS instead.
Hahs.

Yesterday, sneak out of house again. & had an emotional breakdown.
All thanks to my mum ah. The quarell we had before I went for my paper.
Luckily, I manage to hold back my tears in the examination hall.
It's like this trip, I really want to go, no matter what.
And she says that time I can go but now, she say I can't go. Like wth ah.
This really reminds me of what happen last year.
I wanted to go scotland for GG & she don't allow.
Reason being is that the food there not halal. wtf?
But end year came & she allow my brother to go New Zealand!
Like wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf..
So the not fair!! Just because Im a girl, she'll not let me go?
Like that is so unfair and sexist. Please la, not like as if i dont know how to defend myself.
They only care about their own thoughts & feelings & expect me to understand them when they dont even know my interest. Why should i even bother to please them?
Screw them, screw my life, screw everything.
It's always like this whenever I want to go to trips & it always, always happens to me.
Not my brothers. They expect me to get good grades & have a good conduct & follow whatever they say like as if I don't have thoughts & feelings of my own. What do they treat me as?
I feel so disappointed, angry and upset with them.
And certain things are not easy to forget, especially this kind of unfairness.
And this trip, I'll force them to let me go if not, I'm just gonna tell them that i'm gonna screw my Olvls. I mean not seriously la, just threaten.
I just hope my dad will allow and persuade my mum to allow as well.
As for unfairness towards my younger brother, screw him kay.
He gets what he want all the time, it's high time I get what i want now.
Gonna study CH & Bio now.
3 subjects down, 5 more to go!!
Hahs, I so need to buck up on Bio & CH.
And i kinda feel disappointed for not being able to like Amaths.
I mean I used to dislike Bio & amaths but now, i find Bio okay but Amaths still...
Oh watever. Too late to think about all that now.
JY, everyone! 5 more subs to go! :)

2009-10-28T09:26:00.002+08:00

If you plan to fail, you fail to plan!
Hey...another update before I'm off to revisions again.
Just woke up from sleep and had a bath, so right now, I'm abit blurr.
I had a strange dream about some friends of mine and I woke up to an empty house.
So the.... Apparently, my mum always go out in the morning to only God knows where and I'm always left alone at home. Like wth ah.
Anyway, Os has finally start on Monday and English paper is okay la.
Not that bad but I think I screwed up my essay.
Then Emaths was yesterday and I totally freak out.
Well, I was not confident & just afraid i'll screw it.
And I make alot of careless mistakes. How to check when Im left with freaking 10minutes!!
So the...
The examiners are okay except for one. I totally don't like her attitude.
Like chill la, we know what to do. And there's this cute teacher also ( i say cute cos he's ugly but adorable). Hahs. & a teacher who look like ghost! Hahas..
Sorry, it's just a random comment.

Today is Emaths/P2. And tomorrow is Amaths, so is Friday.
Screw Amaths but Im still going for the examinations.
I paid for it, so must waste their paper even though I know I won't do much.
Hahhas..Next week is gonna be rough ride, rougher than this week.
I seriously need to memorise my globalisation shit by Friday.
Not to mention finish revising all my sciences by Sunday.
And this weekend, brother taking the whole family out.
He's gonna drive the car, so not. hahs, no license yet. Hahs.
More like he book my dad and pay him to drive us around.
Just kidding. Not pay but book, yes.
Gonna be a tiring weekend. & i don't think I'll be online until Os over.
But i'll still blog if i got the time. So the damn stressed out.
So 'til next time. :(
Jy! and revise well!

IMY!
And whats up with my name on the back of your calculator?

2009-10-25T20:11:00.002+08:00

Yo!
A quick update before Im off to study English again.
Well, the last time i was online, blogger was having a sickening problem and i can't seem to log in. So the damn shitty but oh well.
Tomorrow is the start of Olevel and boy, I dont know what to think or feel!
All i know is the day that i've been waiting for and can't wait for it to be over is finally here!
Hahs, bet everyone will say I'm crazy if they read what im gonna say now.
So let's embrace and welcome Olevel with warm hearts and when it ends, let's kiss it goodbye.
After many months,days, hours, minutes & seconds of preparing for this impt examination,
I can't deny the fact that Im happy it is now here & will do my best to score well.
I kept saying im not prepared yet but maybe thats a lie.
Now, i realised that im prepared and ready,i'll do what i know and those Qs i dont know, i'll definitely try my best. Hahs.
The bad thing about Olevel is that all the exams are in the noon.
I only got 2 paper in the morning which is CH(ss) & Sc.
Like wth ah. Tomorrow Eng paper gonna end super-late at 5.40pm.
And this week is maths week & all maths paper starts at 2.00pm if im not wrong.
Next week is Science and CH week! And my last paper ends on 12 of Nov!!
Hahs. Thats all i guess. I need to get back to studying.
Ciao!
Jy & revise well! :)

I miss you, Hilfi.
Thanks for believing in me.
and for everything you've done to make me happy.
I love you, sayang.
More than ever. :)

2009-10-19T16:23:00.005+08:00

Screw O level! fuck it & chuck it somewhere far away from me!
Kay, firstly, this post is suggested by this little adik angkat of mine name CELESTINE.
As you can see, there's an unglam picture of her below, so have a look of how unglam she is when she's having fun at a camp. :)
She suggest i talk about my studies & so im gonna talk about my studies.
So far, so good. Well, i've been mugging like shit 'til late-night & the shocking part!!
Sometimes, i can forget to take my meals. So cool huh?
Bio & CH, im working Xtra hard & making an effort to read the damn textbooks.
See how much energy and time im wasting on damn Olevels?
So the....*^*^*^*!!
And O level is in 6 days time, practical on this thursday.
Waiting for 25days to pass! End of Os! Can't wait!! :)
Then this Celestine want me to blog about how cute she is.
Well, honestly, she's not that cute la, i think im cuter. Hahahhs. Kidding. :)
But she's a great person to chat with & the best person to disturb.
Basically, she keeps me entertain with her stories. Hahs.
And she say that Dylan looks like her aunty! So it means Dylan looks like a woman!
But i told her Dylan is actually her Mummy. The one who gave birth to her.
Hahahs, im kidding on that part. Dylan give birth? I'll laugh non-stop!
Hmm.. she's also childish which is funny to me & her reactions are funnier.
Thats all, i guess la about her. I can't gather enough words to make an essay about her. :) I printed out alot of pictures for my 2 BFF & I complied it in a book.
Takes alot of effort but hey, what matters most is the thoughts.
I was thinking of making something for the whole class.
A class that i'll miss having fun with. It'll only remain as memories. :)
Yesterday, went to see Grandpa & thank goodness, he's okay.
Today, he undergo operation & pray that he'll be fine.
These few days, i keep worrying alot. Maybe all thanks to exam-stress.
I need to freaking chill!!!! The weird part is that i'll draw whenever i'm studying.
And all my books is filled up with my name (the 1st picture).
It's like so call my motivation. Freaking weird!
That should be all.
Gonna get some chips to my room & spend the rest of the remaining daylight,
mugging 'til midnight.
So Jiayou peeps!
Left afew more days to go, so let's sprint all the way! :)
Study hard! :)

Hilfi!!!
I don't regret hugging you.
I just want you to be happy like how you want me to be happy.
And i'll only be happy when you are happy. :)
I love you lots.
And i miss you alot now. :(

2009-10-18T12:32:00.003+08:00

I try not to think about the pain i feel inside.
Heyhey..
I said last week will be my last post, right?
Seems like i can't stand not blogging and being online.
But after today, i'm gonna burn midnight oil for Olvl.
Well, there's lots of things happening in my life right now.
And i just dont know where to begin.
Im just tired of all that & these few days has been a rough ride for me.
Emotional being, thats who i am right now.
I want others to be happy & stay that way, even though inside, i'm crying.
I keep everything in me 'cos i know that my opinions will upset others.
Only to tears i gave in to, thats how i express myself.
Those late-night cryings where my emotional barrier will be open.

And things are happening again.
Like my grandpa is at hospital now & im gonna visit him later.
He's my best grandpa ever & i dont want anything to happen to him.
I pray for his well-being all the time.
Next is that Olvl is next week which is shit crap.
Plans are being made after Olvl but the thing is, will my mum allow me to go?
There's so many things i wanna do, but am restricted.
And there's this trip, i really want to go.
To me, it's once in a life-time, i mean who get offers like that?
The thing is, i can go (all thanks to my mountains of edu-save) but
my younger brother can't go. Like wtf wtf wtf!
Screw everything sia.

Then the thing that kept bothering me these past nights is him.
Things are not gonna work out well.
And this is definitely a fact 'cos the problem lies with me & not him.
I shouldn't do what i did on friday, it's a mistake.
I realised that now. Everything is a mistake.
Both of us will only be hurt if we continue on.
I'm so lost & confused.
I do love Hilfi but things will only get much worst in the future.

2009-10-17T16:06:00.003+08:00

Boo!
I just woke up from my sleep & feeling so hungry right now.
And right now, i only got 10 mins to blog everything down 'cos im using bro's laptop.
It's been a tiring week and i didnt realise that i'm lacking sleep until today.
I was forcing myself to study 2hours ago but just fall asleep in the living room.
Then my mum woke me up and ask me go to my room and sleep.
And just now, while waiting for my brother to use his laptop, i was staring at my mountains of book sitting at my study table.
I haven even finish doing all thoae assesements and Olvl is in 8 days time!
*sigh*
That really sucks & im freakingly worried right now.
i seem to be sudying all the time but yet, i just dont think im studying enough.
Later, i'll be going out to Grandpa house for some function.
I hope i'll be able to let myself destress.
Til next time. :)

Is it a mistake to do what i did yesterday?
It only makes me think of you more and more.
It only makes me miss you more and more.
I should stop everything while i still can.
But i can't seem to when i've fallen so deep.

2009-10-13T15:24:00.002+08:00

Back to square one again. (Look at my ratarded bro!)
Hey, this will definitely be my last post for the time being.
Well, honestly, am suppose to be studying now but i'm side-tracking abit.
Today is my graduation day & i feel so happy that finally,
after so many days of waiting, i've finally graduate from North View secondary school.
Happy, yeah i am mixed with another emotion that i identified as sadness.
Honestly, after 4 years of being through thick and thin with my beloved friends,
of course i'll miss them dearly.
& RAIN CHUA, i'll keep the card that you gave me.
20 years down the road, i'll still have the card with me, that i promise you. :)

So many things have happen since i walked into North view 4 years ago.
Friendship formed, love found, lessons learned.
And now, to leave all that behind is definitely heart-breaking.
Even though, i can't wait to embrace my future, I'm also afriad of what'll happen.
Like the future is 10 times harder than now.
Life is damn full of ups and downs.
Hmm.. i dont feel like talking about my feelings here.
Let's just keep everything in my heart.
Thats all, i guess.
JY O level students.
All the best & study hard.

I don't know what our future have for us.

but if at any point of time, you're feeling unhappy with the way things go,

please tell me.

Or when you can't stand the distnace between us any longer,

please tell me.

Loving me is a difficult path you have chose

But you still have time to think it through.

two choices you can choose from;

we can stop everything now

or we can continue on & make it through.

in dilemma right now...

2009-10-11T16:24:00.002+08:00

Kay, this will be my last post now.
Since today is the last time i'll be using my com 'til the end of Os.
And i don't know how the hell am i gonna survive 'cos blogging is part of my life.
Hahahas. And pls keep the tag going even though i'll not be able to reply them.
But i'll reply them only after O level.
Honestly, I can't wait for Graduation but at the same time,
I dont want my friends to be far away from me.
~lol, im getting slightly emotional with all this things.
Tmr school, should i go? should i not?
Haiis, i guess i'll just go la, since it'll be my last day of school.
But so damn crap, all thanks to CH & ENG mock exams.
Near Olvl still got all these crappy exams. So the $%#*#$%^@!!!

I have tried but it's so uncontrolled.

Crazed and ecstatic, Cupid's choke-hold.

Like fighting the oxygen I need for my life.

Bouncing around what's wrong and what's right.

A familiar face and careful hands

Holding me tightly as time lets me mend.

Patient and lovely in all different ways.

A beautiful soul, where my dreams lay.

A haunted past, a world made from dust.

Flammable words threaten to combust.

Forbidden but wanted, secretive moves.

[Nothing can stop me from being with you.]

Consumed by the pain when he walks my way.

And one word from you removes all the ache.

My shoulders are heavy with my dirty deeds.

But deep down inside, please forgive me.

I have waited and pondered and thought,

And I've concluded that you're what I want.

Inside so pure and bright as the moon,

I can't help falling in love with you.

I've tried not thinking about you
but i just can't help it when your image forms in my mind.
I've tried not to dream about you
but i just can't help it when my dreams took over.
I've tried not to miss you too much
but i just can't help the feeling when it took over me.
Then i realise how much i miss you,
how most of the time i keep thinking about you
how most of my dreams are about you.
And now i realise how truly & deeply im in love with you,
plunging into the river of love & never to resurface again.
Everyday that passed by, everything that i touch,
everything that i think of, only reminds me of you.
The power of love so great, so powerful,
it will drag you beneath.
I love you, Hilfi.
More than ever.

2009-10-11T13:31:00.007+08:00

"Something more...
Searching...
Wishing...
Needing...
Something more than this...
You can't see ahead if you keep gazing behind..."

Hey, this post will be the last post until Os over.
I can't afford to waste my time on com, Tv & etc.
Grr... Left like afew more days to Os & i just realised my Bio still alot i don't know.
Especially the damn DNA shit thing la. I'm like never gonna get it. -.-
This week was fun, more like thursday & friday are the fun days.
Thursday went out to have a break from studying & bought some last minute stuff.
Friday, i went out at sunrise to enjoy fresh air & then go back home & start to study.
It's like i manage to absorb more when im at home studying compared to school.
Like WTH huh? This picture on top was taken when i was at 10th level of my blk.
And fyi, my home was not on the 10th level. :)
I was trying to get a nice picture of the forest in front of my blk but can't.
Like wth ah, i was thinking of majoring in photography but my parents kinda against it.
Oh well, i still dont know what i want.
For now, i just wanna study hard & get as low as possible.
What i want, after Os then i'll think about it.

Haiiss....
Miss him, miss him, miss him..
:( gonna miss him alot when school ends & during Os.

2009-10-08T09:50:00.003+08:00

Its important to do the right things then do things right.
Hmm.. Today is like Thursday and im suppose to be in school right now.
But here i am at home, studying my butts off. So the grrr....
Prelim 3 results are not that bad. Well, my sc just makes me happy.
I got 2nd in the whole 4E/5N. Cool eh? But still need to work hard.
Besides that also, my emaths not that bad & shockingly, i pass CH!
WTH ah.. This week is abit crazy for me.
Well, monday & tuesday was alot more fun than wed.
But nowadays, i find the classes a waste of time.
& i can't wait for Graduation to come! 4 more days to go!
And i dont think i'll be coming school until graduation. I rather study at home. :]

Things at home has been kinda okay for me.
My mum is talking normally with me again.
As for my dad, he's just being himself which is rarely talking to me.
I can't wait for Os to be over! I wanna work!
Dylan says he's start working tomorrow! Im so jealous!
Hmm.. come to think of something, i still owe my Sham & Chow their birthday presents.
Well, it's almost done. But stil not done yet. Hahs.
Wait til graduation, then they'll receive their presents.

Hmm.. I guess thats all for now.
I need to get back to studying.
'Til then! JY! :]

p.s. IMY. :[

2009-10-04T16:05:00.004+08:00

Life is a journey where adventure beckons at every turn.
Grrrr... So damn frustrated and pissed off with what happen this week.
Well, after like 5 days of cold war with them, we finally talk with each other again.
But i can still feel tension in the air & know what?
I'm not going to care much about it. I'm just so sick & tired of everything that they want me to do.
I'm neither a fucking robot nor a fucking machine. I'm not perfect & not going to be a perfectionist.

Prelim results are out this week and i did okay la. Still need alot of practise & left like 22 more days!
Grrrr... I'm so not prepared for Olevel but I can't wait for it to end. Weird huh?
Back to my results, chem result is the most shocking one. 78/100 .
And I don't even like chem, so many things to remember.
Hmm.. something to look forward to. GRADUATION!! 13 OCT 2009!! 8 more days! :)

Hmm.. this picture (on top) reminds me of something as well as someone.

Oh well, classes are more fun nowadays unlike last time where classes are boring.

But i still got bored easily in class though.

Everyday has become a routine for me up until olvl are over.

Wake up, go school, attend classes, then go home & study again.

So familiar routine 'til i got bored of it easily.

Well, nevermind, for the sake of getting good results.

Can't wait til olvl are over, then its party time! :)

This is a retarded guy name Dylan. & he was getting raped by someone which is me.
All thanks to him saying a false information. hahahahas..
So funny sia.
And ya, thanks for listening to all my whines for the last two days.
For that-thing also, thanks alot. :)

As for now, I'm gonna mug 'til I drop dead.
No distractions for the time being.
And HOT NEWS!!
JUNJUN is GAY!! hahahahs..
Thats all, i guess.
'Til i post again, sometime & someday when I'm free again.
Which i think will be next Sunday. 'Til then.
:) Study hard everyone!

Ony as high as i reach can i grow,

Only as far as i seek can i go,

Only as deep as i look can i see,

Only as much as i dream can i be.

2009-09-25T13:26:00.002+08:00

With every step you climb another mountain
Every breath it's harder to believe
You make it through the pain, weather the hurricanes
To get to that one thing
Just when you think the road is going nowhere
Just when you almost gave up on your dreams
They take you by the hand and show you that you can
You can go higher, you can go deeper
There are no boundaries above and beneath you
Break every rule 'cause there's nothing between you and your dreams

Today is my elder brother's birthday!!
Happy birthday yang ke-20!! 20 years old liao, OLD MAN!!
Hahs, doubt he'll see this soon cos right now, he's in camp.
I miss him alot and how i wish he can come back right now!
And do all my chores for me. Hahahahass..
Ya, he always do chores for me & now, i have to do myself! *whines*
This weekend, my relatives coming over to my house.
So ytdy, i began my work of cleaning my untidy,unruly & messy room.
Its exhausting and tiring cos i got lots of papers & books, not to mention soft toys.

Today, i got no school & so i went out as early as 7am.
Everyone walking towards school but i was walking towards bus-stop. Hahs.
My bro & me accompany our mum go wet market.
Well, it was fun ah but got this two guy keep wandering around there.
Like thieves like that sia, watching people.
On the way back home, the three of us walk & i was teasing my brother all the way.
And when i got home, i help mum bersihkan dapur. Damn crap sia.
GGRRR... So dirty ah.

I had a talk with Brandon and i feel much better right now.
Before that, i was feeling rather down or shitty.
All thanks to what's been happening in the last few weeks.
Late last night, i sneak out to take a walk again.
Its becoming a habit for me ah & somemore, my parents dont know i was out.
Well, if i dont go out, i'll be tossing & turning in bed.
Which will only make me think more of things that i dont want to think.
So, thats why i go out & see buiding lights, hahs.
& sometimes moonlight against the dark night sky. :]

Grr.. I miss Hilfi right now.
I wish he's here to talk to me or make me smile/laugh.
& i wonder what's he doing right now.
Honestly, i didnt know i'll fall so deeply in love with him,
after that relationship i had.
Now, it seems that everything that i do will remind me of Hilfi.
Sometimes, he even appear in my dreams.
the power of being in love, it's just weird.

2009-09-24T12:03:00.013+08:00

I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly
I'll do what it takes til' I touch the sky
I'll make a wish
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway
Out of the darkness and into the sun
But I won't forget all the ones that I loved
I'll take a riskTake a chance
Make a change
And breakaway

Wanna feel the warm breeze
Sleep under a palm tree
Feel the rush of the ocean
Get onboard a fast train
Travel on a jet plane, far away (I will)
And breakaway

Finally!! Prelim 3 are over!! *jumps*
Amaths paper i slept again but i tried the questions before i sleep.
Yesterday was damn tiring & my emotions like shit.
Well, i just sneak out of the house after mid-night & took a walk.
I just need a damn break from everything.
Basically, i kept taking walks by myself to either destress myself or just cry my heart out.
Its kinda weird but these few days, I just felt as though people are so...
Nevermind, another day i'll explain. Best to keep things to myself.
I dont get why people are so fake, like so photogenic.
& come to think of it, will it hurt for everyone to be truthful for once?

Today, i walk in the rain again, just like yesterday.
Hoping that the rain will wash away all my worries, my doubts & my nightmares.
But when i walk in the rain, only coldness accompanied me & im falling sick once again.
The days that pass by now seems more suckier than ever,from good to bad to worst.
There's always dark clouds passing by, sometimes staying to make things worst
& not only that, im just so sick and tired of it.
Why can't things just go back to normal or the way it used to be?
Why can't we just spend some time together? Its been months since we went out together.
I just wonder if you even remember..
Or maybe what Sham say is true, you don't like spending time with us anymore.
Now, it seems that you rather spend time with others than us. & that is 'wow' for me.
It takes alot of courage for me to post this & if im hurting you with what i say, im sorry.
I didnt mean to, i just want you to know what i feel about our friendship,
Our fading friendship..

Hari Raya was kinda alright for me.
I'll just let the pictures do the talking. More pictures at fb.

what's missing, is missing.
what's gone is gone.
let's wait for the new to come.

It's been quite a long time since i last saw you.
This weekend is gonna be a long one.
& right now, i'm already missing you.
Everyday, i tire myself out so that when night time comes,
I'll just fall asleep & not think of you.
Sometimes, i just wish for you to be by my side.
Each time, i walk home alone, how i wish you're there with me.
You never fail to make me smile or laugh or be happy,
even when im having the worst day ever in school.
Im falling into this river of love with you,
And i have no regrets.

2009-09-19T13:53:00.008+08:00

Freedom is not doing everything you feel like doing it when you feel like doing it.
Freedom is choosing today what will give you more of what you want tomorrow.

Hari Raya is tomorrow. Hahs. -No comments right now.-
Today, last day of fasting month & WTH, i'm not fasting.
Exams have gone by quickly, left 1 more week to go & im totally exhausted.
Fire burning in me is dying out soon, much too soon than i imagine.
2 full papers have gone & the rest still half-way through.
Geo paper, i was sleepy & last minute my mind went blank. Damn crap & i cursed myself.
Then Amaths is just Amaths. Basically, i slept for 1 & 1/2 hours.
I was in Fitri's land already & this teacher woke me up asking a dumb question,
"Are you okay?"( tapping my shoulder at the same time)
I look up to her, nod & went back to sleep.

Hmm... yesterday night, i just finish reading this book 'To Forget You'.
& i ended up crying my heart out. The tears didnt stop 'til about 12am.

The story is so sad ah but the ending is too abrupt. I still want to know what happen to the girl.

Yesterday, after i studied for awhile, i went to play bball & soccer, resulting in my shoes getting dirty. & Sham says i kick the ball damn rough. Hahs..
Then Sham drag me to Np & i drag Arvind to follow me.
& what Sham bought for me is unexpected but thanks alot!! :]
I love you shamala! You're the best! :)
Today evening, my elder brother coming home from camp & goshness, i really miss having him around. Ridduan is abit shit when it comes to doing his part in chores.
So in the end, i'll have to do his chores, make me more exhausted.
Plus the fact that i study 'til late night & get very little sleep.
Can't wait for Os to be over!! Left 1 month! JY, fitri!

Our love will last if its strong enough.
Time & distance are obstacles that can be overcome with a strong love.
How i wish i can live in the present & not think about tomorrow.
But tomorrow keeps haunting me & i'm forced to think about it.
It's gonna be tough.
Love can make you smile for the rest of your life
but it can also make you cry for the rest of your life.
It's like a fire that will either warm your heart or burn you down.

2009-09-16T17:29:00.002+08:00

Hey..
Today is Wednesday & tomorrow is Thursday.
Like DUH!!
I'm totally stress out & the last time i check, i've been studying Geo.
WTH...
This sucks.. 3 papers have passed, still alot more to go.
Tomorrow is Geo & Amaths..
So gonna fall asleep during Amaths.
Thats all ba..
Any more updates is this sat, i guess..

P.s. I miss you, Hilfi.

2009-09-12T14:43:00.003+08:00

Like they say, all good things must come to an end.

Left like today & tomorrow of the sep break only. The week flew by way too fast.

Well,the one week break was kinda okay for me, except for the studying part.

It's abit torture to force myself to sit down & study for hours.

Basically, monday, tuesday & thursday, i went to school to study.

In the morning, all of us were motivated but later in the evening, we grew restless.

And when that happens, we start to disturb each other. Hahs. So fun sia.

Wednesday, i went out with Brothers & Mum to buy stuff for H.R.

Well, come to think of it, i guess this yr H.R. will be meaningful to my family.

Yesterday, which is Friday, is like shit day because it's the day where my elder brother enter NS.

& i'm super-worried for him. Let's just say he's not physically-prepared.

I really hope he'll be able to cope & i'll miss not having someone to quarell with.

& also, now no one will do my chores for me! :[

when i was at the Ferry Terminal, i had flashbacks.

the terminal & ferry were similar to the ones i ride to & fro for Nat camp.

& those little islands that i saw when i'm in the Ferry, they remind me of OBS.

i miss my camp friends & also attending camps where nature is just close-by.

After seeing my bro off, my dad brought us to Geyalng Serai.

My younger brother bought his baju-raya there & it's purple in colour. Hahs.

But it matches my elder bro's baju kurung.

Ridduan's baju kurung is pink in colour. & mine is....hahs, wont tell. :]

3 weeks of fasting have gone by, left a week more. Time really flies.

Prelim3 is like on monday. ALL THE BEST 4E/5N STUDENTS!

After Prelim3, 2 weeks to suffer, then graduation, then 2 weeks later, Olvl!

Left afew more weeks to suffer & after that, off i go for a long long holidays! :]

Right now, study hard & relax a little.

I'll be back for updates someday. :]

Another sleepless night...

Each day, hoping against hope, only to be replace by disappointment.

Every night, wishing for a better tomorrow, only to deceive myself again.

Hope is something i hold onto but now, it already fade away.

Never to be returned back to its original place.

(Everything that flies by me is just too fast.)

2009-09-05T15:34:00.002+08:00

I'm gonna post another post right now.
Hahs, just felt that im totally out of touch from other people.
I only know the happenings of my friends, me & Hilfi.
Other than that, i so don't know what happen to others.
Anyway, i got like a few more minutes to remain online before im off.
Well, I going to my aunty house celebrate my niece's birthday.
She's super-cute pls. & just can't wait to see her.

Until we meet
My nights will be a little colder
My days a little shorter
My heart will beat a little less rapid
Until we meet
I know that my arms will be empty
My mind hurting from the constant thought of you
Minutes will seem to be hours
Hours will seem to be months
While months will seem like eternity
Until we meet
The stars in the sky will not affect me with its gleaming sparkles of life
Until I am gazing at them in your arms
And the food that I eat will not be as fulfilling and nourishing
Until it is you that I share the my food with
And Until we meetI will not feel whole
My world will seem incomplete
Until that wonderful day
When our eyes make first contact
And our bodies and souls collide in blissful whirlwind
The words will roll off my tongue like a sweet love song
"Hello, my love, I couldn't wait to meet you."

In life, learn how to appreciate things within your reach.

Be grateful with what you have before it's gone.

Im grateful to God for what i have in my life..

My family, friends & Hilfi who love me..

I always told myself in times of despair that im one fortunate soul

To have people who will be there for me when i fail..

To have people who love me for who i am..

& having the chance to express myself..

I always took life for granted but not anymore..

Im making the best out of it & living to the fullest..

To those people that i've hurt in search of my happiness,

im sorry.